Two-step

Dance with me tonight
In your dusty shoes
And whisper dirty woos

Make me fall in love with
sweet cou cous

Then step on my toe
And do it slow

smear fear on my soul
I let it go

Reviews

[JayG]

You need to trot over to Amazon and read the excerpt from Stephen Fry's, The Ode Less Traveled. There's a LOT more to writing poetry than there appears to be, and he can get you started.

[Reetta]

Hello Jay G

Thank you for your review - my
recent poems are written for myself by myself to help me process emotions

Hope that helps with understanding the context

[JayG]

Yes, it was written for for you. But you posted it in public for others to read, in a form unintelligible to others.

Instead, why not dig into skills that will take your feelings and make those readers feel them. It's the difference between telling the reader you cried at a funeral and giving that reader reason-to-weep.

Poetry's goal isn't the telling people how the writer feels. It's entertaining the reader by making THEM feel, and care.

Yes, it does involve time learning the skills, but so what? It takes your mind off your current problems while doing it, and, you end up with a new communication skill.

Try this, in addition to that article I suggested:

Mary Oliver's, A Poetry Handbook, is a joy to read, and filled with little surprises that you'll find eye-opening.

https://dokumen.pub/a-poetry-handbook-0156724006.html

[Reetta]

Hi thanks again for your suggestions. If anything, I think I conveyed my distraught mood rather well in this poem, seeing as it seems to have lingered with you.