once a small opening

once a small opening

 

 

a window pane

cold to the touch,

slightly ajar sensation

shivering in a doorway

 

the latch broken,

heart absconded 

 

another sudden breeze of you

felt in a winter's reflection

 

you were my summer once

but green dreams eventually autumn

into rapid endings,

 

and that gold leaf of endearment

cackles with sadistic veins

of dark humor

 

as we are left,

trying to wedge something between

 

what we are holding in,

and what might hold us in.

 

 

erin-cilberto

2/7/16

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

Honest reflection in this one. Summer never lasts forever....especially in a romance. However, those balmy breezes of memory to ruffle through our thoughts now and then. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Lydi..

j.

[poet_feefee]

This writing feels so personal. It captures both hope and despair in a way that most have experienced.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, poet_feefee,

j.

[Brittany Bostic]

Several phrases jumped out at me as I read this. Comparing someone to winter and summer, growing into fall or darkening into winter is so wistful. "sadistic veins of dark humor," is an incredibly intriguing line. Great, as always

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Brittany,
j.

[Lyn Anderson]

wistful and beautiful in its brevity. As always, a pleasure.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, KL...
j.

[Scrap]

This made me hold my breath.

Really beautifully, cleverly written. Goosebumps.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Scrap.

j.

[softlyfall]

This is so subtly brilliant. The opening allusion, formed in the first 9 lines, sets up the winter of cold love theme, but then the poem shifts. The theme continues but from this point on every line has perfect craftsmanship...
Green dreams autumn into rapid endings is just breathtaking...
Gold leaf endearment morphing cruelly into sadistic veins of dark humor is scary-good, intense and mind satisfying brilliance.
No wonder you are a published poet.
Hella good.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, Amy....
j.

[softlyfall]

You're welcome.