were we ever really a couplet

were we ever really a couplet

 

 

arthritic fingers

bang the keys slowly

 

some unmeant poetic twists

obscure phrasing with accidental annoyance

 

i didn't mean to write you

just to hold your attention

 

through a few phrases

and maybe a kinetic kiss or two

 

then pan our conspirator-y

relationship

 

with a negative review

even though i loved you.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

12/17/19

Reviews

[redzone]

love is the biggest 'conspiracy' of them all.... it starts out innocently enough, some words, a phrase or two here and there, maybe a kiss, (it's a plot by Eros and Aphrodite) and then ends with that negative review and you are manipulated down the River Styx into Hades realm... so then why do we do it??? it's a conspiracy of oneness that always wants to be a couplet... we are a hopeless lot are we not Jacob!!! good thing we have poetry to ease our wounded hearts....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

it turns into the River Stynx...i think..
we do it because we seem programmed to get our hearts broken a time or two or three.
thank you, Curt.
j.

[Jimmy Yetts]

A couplet always has two lines--yours and hers--you were a "couplet," in that sense.
How can you help but "review" that failed relationship in anything but a negative frame
of mind? Obviously, it once reflected your highest hopes.
Smartly and painfully portrayed.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, Jimmy....i do remember some high hopes...
j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, Jimmy....i do remember some high hopes...
j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Good play on words...couple/couplet. Your words here are a bit cynical and the metaphor is splendid. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Lydi,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

Bunnies are the best at what they do...
syncopated rhythm among the grasses
Where butterflies 🦋 Light precariously ...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Pat,
j.

[Einstein Noodle]

i'm in love with couplets jacob ... they are a comfortable, stable place to retreat to ... man! love can be so hard ... tedious and frustrating as we jockey for position ... i really like the turn in closing ... a fine tuned sarcasm if i ever sung one ..another fine read from your pages for me
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, E.
j.

[andrew mitchell]

yes love brings us together but after the clouds clear what remains may tear us apart.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, andrew,
j.

[kitty]

Its sometimes hard to put a finger on the reason why we do things that are contrary to rational reasoning. We get carried along and never go against the grain ...as long as it feels comfortable ...to a certain extent. food for thought!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, kitty,
j.

[kitty]

You are most welcome!