Custody of a Whim

Custody of a Whim

 

 

chilly breezes blow

from blond tresses

bow to November's calling

 

I loved her into autumn

but her summer's vow to me

ended

 

with the first frost

and I was left 

a statutory bloom

 

arrested, 

duly assumed

to have presumed

 

she was my forever flower.

 

 

erin-cilberto

11/1/2020

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Growing up at a recreational lake, the summer influx of those seeking work & play always concluded with futile promises to keep in touch after everyone goes back to their "real lives" in faraway towns, while I stayed on in the solitude of this freshly-abandoned playground. As I recall, it would be about November when everyone stopped pretending to stay in touch . . . *sigh!* Fondly, Margie

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I was reading your review, and it made me think of the Beach Boys' song "Girl Don't Tell me"
do you remember that one?
"Girl don't tell me you'll write me again this time"

I also remember from the limited time I spent on facebook, getting back in touch with certain people who appeared so grateful to be back in touch, and yet after a couple messages back and forth---nothing., Can't be one-sided.
Thank you for your understanding, Margie.
j.

[barleygirl]

Back in the day (not being a bit political) I did not realize what a redneck republican area I grew up in until I got on FB (all those years later) & so many people sent me friend requests, remembering me from HS. We soon went our separate ways becuz I'm too liberal for them & they're too Trumpian for me! *wink! wink!*

[Fran Marie]

I loved her into autumn
but her summer's vow to me
ended

as Novembers frosted
winds breathed low
taking summers warm
love a flower forever gone

nice work here ;Jacob

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your beautifully poetic reply...
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Summer's vow, maybe this was a wedding vow that lost all its heat in winter climes. November is a dismal, bleak month. Painful feelings here. I feel the hurt. Flowers dear Jacob don't last forever, unless they are made of plastic. I'm sure she wasn't. Lovely write, but soooooo sad.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Chris,
j.

[Tania Mo]

Summer vows on a whim.The frost stiffens and kills the vows.We stand frozen and snubbed.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your understanding words, Tania,
j.

[AJNJ]

The sturdiest flower cannot survive the killing frost of winter. Perhaps the summer vows were meant in all earnest and the spirit was willing, but the flesh was weak....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, AJNJ,
j.

[Dave]

Summer love that has turned from warmth to the cold of winter. What a sad realization. Sad as it is, I like it.

Take care - Dave

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review,
j.

[.]

Summer's vows are warmer than November... More chilly days more coldness in the relation. As usual very nice write

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Dreamer,
j.

[Einstein Noodle]

:( ................................ intelligent and very emotive says i! "....statutory bloom" ... sheesh!
November into winter slumber or death :(.........................
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, E.
j.

[duff]

I like how the seasons are woven with a higher meaning. A skillful touch to make it blend into the entirety of the message. Between flowers, frost and more I like how you check the readers senses.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, duff,
j.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Just read a 'forever' post from Nicole and this sort of dovetailed with it. You capture the cold feeling of abandonment as that relied upon melts into the darkness. Powerful.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, John.
j.