Passion

Passion

a night of unfinished thoughts

started poems

interrupted rhymes

no flow, it's so

i am impeded

stymied

unglued

typing gibberish

Browning i am not

Frost i could'a been

in another life

one with woods and snow

and a different mind

sense is reason

reason is poetry

days of completed thoughts

finished poems

uninterrupted rhymes

perfect flow, it's so

but i have no sense

i am nobody special

and the keys hate me

for not being

who i could'a been

should'a been

i am drawing near those woods now

and it is feeling

very cold.

erin-cilberto

9/11/22

Reviews

[Ken e Bujold]

Jacob this could, perhaps should be required reading for every aspiring poet. A night of unfinished thoughts...absolutely one of the best opening lines period. I know you will understand when I say the one mistake too many aspiring poets make is in rushing or simply settling for a poem's uncompleted thought. The truth we both know is that many a poem is stillborn, and if a few stray lines survive for transplant we've had a good day's work

Ken e

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, that's it, Ken.
that's it...
thank you,
j.

[supernova_thoughts]

There are so many unfinished thoughts resulting in confused writings. I sometimes cannot understand my poems but reasonably feel related. Excellent write, J. Take care

[jacob erin-cilberto]

same here, supernova...
same here.
j.

[redd Brick Keshner]

Oh yes, and about those keys and the keypad/board in general.... the clacking they make isn't always dulcet or profound. Crazy times. Thanks j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

so right, as much as we wish that sound was profound.
j.

[redd Brick Keshner]

At certain times finishing off with a flourish as the typewriter drum spits out the finished page is the best part after that final return lever cha-ching!

[John the Baptist]

It so happens I am reading Frost now. Wrote some great poetry, but you wouldn't have wanted to be him. Severely depressed much of his life. It once caused him to threaten his wife with a pistol. Be glad you are who you are.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

like many comedians who are actually very depressed but make others laugh constantly.
j.

[Chris Shaw]

You are the most prolific poet I know J. A night of unfinished thoughts is rare for you. I have hundreds of unfinished thoughts, but they aren't wasted. I turn to them at a later date and sometimes they are salvaged. Your keyboard doesn't hate you I assure you.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

sooner or later we are able to finish them...it is wise to save them...
j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Not only could you have been "a contenda", Jacob, I believe you are the winner and still champ! When we are in the third third of our lives, regrets tend to sneak up on us and torment us. The keys do not hate you, my friend. I think they do your bidding quite nicely! Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Lydi...
j.

[W. Barrett Munn]

I remember advice given someone somewhere about writing-you're going to write mountains of crap before you ever write anything good so you might as well get started now.
Also, what Mary Oliver said, that writing memorable poetry should be the goal of every poet but it was as difficult as carrying water in a sieve.
I am much closer to the crap stage of life but bailing like crazy with a worn-out sieve.
Winston

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I agree with Mary. Thanks for the words, Winston,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Jacob… you are given a Gift of more Years… to share your Verses of Passion where Flowers open and reach for your Touch. tenderly, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Pat,
j.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Eh, who wants to be Frost? You could be Frosty and have "a corncob pipe and a button nose and two eyes made out of coal." I wouldn't mind "Browning" if I could do it under some Jamaican sun or some other tropical island place. The Fall cometh! I just bought the kid a huge pumpkin for the school pumpkin social festival. I have no idea what they're going to do with that. She wants to carve it into a Jack-O-Lantern and put an electric candle in it. We'll see. Old Bob said he threw over half his poems away. We should go dumpster diving! Nah, I'm sure they've been hauled away by now. Besides I wouldn't plagiarize him or his queer thinking horse. I'm certain the keys do not hate you. Even if you have writer's lock. I'm going to toddle off and find the mind I've lost now. Until next time, cheerio or fruit loops or whatever they eat for breakfast in England.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

love Jack-o-lanterns...I hope you find your mind....and actually, I am not a Frost fan anyway...
read morelove Jack-o-lanterns...I hope you find your mind....and actually, I am not a Frost fan anyway...
thank you,
j.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I'm all better now. Sleep deprivation makes me silly. I just needed my nap. I get up at the oddest hours for my age. I was up at 3 am getting ready for my Sunday. Oh, and writing, of course.

[Lorry]

Those nights are part of poetry and part of life. It's funny how they suddenly reappear in the minds eye, sometimes months or years later, with just a fragment, word or line that fit perfectly into what you are writing, or even inspire a new write from a simple word or thought.
I remember after giving up exhausted one night, that I dreamt of going into a pharmacy and asking if they had anything for a struggling poet. She smiled and instantly brought me a bottle of inspiration-ease.
I didn't finish that write, but yours just brought back that memory 😊

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, I have given up on writes, but saved them somewhere...next look they may be better than I thought...or revisable into something decent.
thank you, Lorry,
j.