Free Sodas

Free Sodas

 

 

frivolous excuses

love is a myth of intention

just words,

just poems written with no heart

 

the real sincerity

is on some menu

at a drive-in restaurant

prices not available

 

apparent drive-offs

burn rubber

squealing tales submitted

no truth

 

no love

no tip

just a fable

with a tray

as table.

 

 

erin-cilberto

9/16/22

Reviews

[andrew mitchell]

How actions speak louder than words. You got to back it up. Yes! What is love without a connection? Free soda, but the sex/love on roller skates you see is not for sale.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yep, not for sale...thanks, andrew,
j.

[Lydia Shutter]

It is so easy to tell when someone strings words together without emotion. The poem resulting in that is never a truly great one. Poetry has to come from the heart and has to be based on honesty. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you write with much heart, Lydi!

[John the Baptist]

Bitterness on display here. Romantic love is "just words/poems written with no heart." It even compares poorly with menus at a drive-in restaurant, where drive offs with no tips are the norm. Forcefully put and honest, but the Bard probably couldn't have made a sonnet of it.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

what's a sonnet? :))))
thank you for your review, John,
j.

[Ken e Bujold]

I love how this poem progresses from a hard cynicism, the myth of intention no heart, through a series of verses that diminish the bitterness to an almost whimsical acceptance of mortality.
Enjoyable read Jacob

Ken e

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Ken,
j.

[W. Barrett Munn]

I do believe I have been through that drive-in and I thought those were squashed ketchup packets but now I have learned it’s blood from broken hearts.

Winston

[jacob erin-cilberto]

that's funny...thanks, Winston,
j.

[Blunt--Instrument]

Dig the writing

BIG LIKE

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Blunt...
j.

[Chris Shaw]

The tray for one in the final stanza tells a lonely story. A table for two can be full of promise, until a spanner mucks up the works. Poems written with no heart are a right turn off. Frivolus excuses cause confusion and drive offs are a positive disaster dear J.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your understanding review, Chris,
j.

[Augustine]

i like the idea of love being a commodity that we order without knowing the cost. kind of reminds me of going through a mcdonald's drive-thru drunk when you're happy, free, confused and lonely at once, and nothing will ever be like it is in that moment again

[jacob erin-cilberto]

so many emotions at once, quite confusing...
thank you for your kind and insightful review.read moreso many emotions at once, quite confusing...
thank you for your kind and insightful review.
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

In the Fifties... we had Drive-Ins with Soda Pop, Burgers and fries.
The Waitresses wore Mini Skirts that twirled as they walked with a Tray of delicious delicacies. Free speech was popular, as well as Free extra Soda.
tenderly, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, I certainly remember those...and we thought we were in love...
j.

[red93]

I like this a lot Jacob and what I like is that lovely colloquial almost throw-away delivery you have - I was going to say Ginsberg but actually I think at times it is more like that eternal rebel Bukowski. Really Fabulous ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, red...although I despise Bukowski...Ginsberg I do like immensely.
I do appreciate the kind review.
j.

[red93]

👍👍👍👍👍