Shakespeare in the 21st Century...a comic tragedy using much simpler language.

Shakespeare in the 21st Century...a comic tragedy using much simpler language.

 

 

flat heart

no spare

the beating is hobbled

 

your love driving

me freewheeling

in circles

 

cut into square tread,

striking the median

flipping over with sadness

 

coming to a drunk stop

bleeding from my eyes

I can no longer visualize

 

you,

even if your name 

ruptured onto my wind screen.

 

 

erin-cilberto

8/1/23

Reviews

[William Michael Reeves]

Like a bug ... splat!! Have you been driving under the influence of love? I just happened to get new tires for my buggy today so there was an unintentional connection to my activities. Interesting how poetry does that.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

It sure does. thanks William.
j.

[W. Barrett Munn]

I certainly see the tragi-comedy and trying to guess if this is not based on any one play but a compilation.

Winston

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, a compliation of unwritten ones...he is too good, I am too bad.
thank you, Winston,
read moreyes, a compliation of unwritten ones...he is too good, I am too bad.
thank you, Winston,
j.

[W. Barrett Munn]

Don’t belittle yourself. He was a playwright who also wrote verse.

[Marvin Thomas Cox-Flynn..]

Jacob,

Let's face it, the brutally frank is rank with video-minded imbecilic idiocy of clueless to exactly what a play is and is not, but for sports and those fools who are players and do play her until she wises up and dumps their asses ... And so, Shakespeare would be a flops fudge-cycle failure in the 21st century but for few like you and I that probably and did take Shakespeare classes ... Powerful message ...

Marvin Thomas Cox-Flynn de Graham

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Shakespeare would enjoy your review here...might even have you narrate his next play at the Globe...
if you were up for it.
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Jacob… the tread is like driving on thin Ice… high as a Kite… the spare has disappeared… I will Wing my way to Destiny… where it is written in the Stars… gently, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Pat,
j.

[Cassie]

Such a lovely poem with a funny twist. Always enjoy reading you

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Cassie,
j.

[emmajoygreen]

Such a clever adaptation, sir.. you have The Word in you hand as did She, methinks! Do you ask your students to create exercises like this:
you
even in your name
ruptured onto my wind screen '

Full marks an d more, jacob, sir.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your full marks, em. You are the first teacher who has passed me! :)))
Take care of you, my friend.
j.

[emmajoygreen]

'You work hard, you try hard m and that matters, lad.'

Take care of you too, sir. read more'You work hard, you try hard m and that matters, lad.'

Take care of you too, sir.

[Patricia]

still uniquely you and a poem that is identifiable to most all. Powerful ending!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Patricia,
j.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Love the ending Jacob
A fantastic write one of your best

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Julie,
'j.

[Light and ashes]

What an abrupt ending.
Jagged and frigid is how I would describe this write, but the language is so eloquent and so gently expressed. In other words, I thoroughly enjoyed it.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

jagged and frigid...I like that.
thank you, Light,
j.

[Light and ashes]

Happy to do it, jacob.

[DIVYA]

This is a love slipping beyond control. There is so much stalling and confusion. The heart is flat. I loved the concluding line, it carries such a punch. The sadness is so palpable.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your words, my friend,
j.