Plastic Flowers

Plastic Flowers

 

 

overly enthusiastic alliteration

overwhelms

 

succinctly spliced synonyms

secede

 

the union of words

breaks up

 

Civil War of witless concern

conceded

 

linguistics lie languidly 

listless

 

on a field of dazzling daisies

deceased

 

there are no flowers left

on either side of the poem

 

rigid rhyme reflects

residuals

 

as the reader wrests 

philandering punctuation

 

that dictates deliberate diction

as dead daisies

 

wander willfully

among aspiring minds

 

misfiring

two-sides sadistically succumbing

 

as lines linger in a forgery

begging the question

as to whether or not

 

the flowers were ever real.

 

 

erin-cilberto

4/21/24

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Well, it's better to have plastic flowers than only drab gray walls to look at I guess. After reading this my tongue needed to rest for five minutes. (smile) Not really. I like the rapid fire alliteration and short punchy style. Of course your extended metaphor goes down smoothly as a cold drink of water on a hot day. It's always a pleasure to read your words, F.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate your kind review, Fabian,
j.

[Poetic Beauty]

What pop in my mind when I read this is a the place where words and ideas go to die

[jacob erin-cilberto]

How sad that place is.
thank you, P.B.
it is so good to have you back at WC.
j.

[Poetic Beauty]

I’m glad to be back. It helps keep me focused on writing and I miss talking with everyone on here. Unfortunately life gets crazy sometimes and well one sometimes forgets passwords lol

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Really nice work. it really takes on how we question your former loved one after they split up,That's how I felt after my last divorce. I felt like I didn't know my ex at all.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I never knew one of mine, that is for sure.
thank you, Dale,
j.

[Vex]

An interesting metaphor this one, reminding us that to question everything is never a bad thing. In the contrary, it encourages growth in ourselves, a strange sort of bloom.

Thank you for sharing this one

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your words...I have always been a curious one, and always questioned.
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Jacob.. we have a wild garden of small Hyacinths that appear each year… as Hope survives through tears. May you be blessed with Longevity. As always. Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

so far so good...I am surviving.
thank you, dear Pat,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

A feast of alliteration here j. My thoughts are that all flowers eventually die. None of them survive. Best remember a field of beautiful daisies, fresh in the sunlight. Plastic flowers are probably better than nothing, but I don’t keep plastic flowers in my home. They are fresh or nothing at all. A plastic flower has no fragrance and gathers dust. Another extended metaphor, you are the expert my friend.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Chris.
j.

[mae]

“there are no flowers left on either side of the poem.” powerful. -mabel

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your words, mabel.
j.

[Amanda Renee]

Wow! I have a poem of the same title that I will post (way shorter than yours) I love your line, "there are no flowers left on either side of the poem", brilliant!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Amanda...I am on my way to yours, now.