the perpetual gift

the perpetual gift

i only gave you ties

for your birthday

for Christmas

for Father's Day

i never understood what you really needed

maybe i just didn't get how to be the son

you expected

i only gave you ties

colorful ones you were probably

embarrassed to wear

but you did anyway

to make me believe you loved them

sons in the proper light

look successful

like perfect suns

in the most adamant azure sky

i only gave you ties

but made so many awkward knots

in them

with my naivety

even after i grew older

i never understood what you really needed

to be

or me to be

but there was a sense of security

knowing i could lean or fall in your direction

and your dad hands could stand me

back upright

uptight that i might disappoint

i only gave you ties

the safe bet

the accessory you needed

from the son who never understood

what you really needed

to be

or me to be.

but i miss you

and this time

the tie will remain in the box

the price tag still attached

i can't afford to give it away.

erin-cilberto

6/15/25

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

A touching write j where you pen the relationship you had with your Father. Who really understands perfectly the needs of another? What is important to me here as a reader is that without doubt
there was love and he is greatly missed. It brought to mind something my Dad said to me. He told me I was his number one critic and yet I loved him to bits and now older me wishes I could have been more understanding and not so vocal when it came to his flaws. He certainly accepted mine. A lovely piece.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for sharing that, Chris.
In recent talks with my sister, I am taking a closer look at my dad's flaws as well...but the positive for me overrides the negative by a longshot.
We have to remember they were human, flawed but loved us the best they could.
j.

[carl]

I deeply stated exposure that calls to the heart of all who never really understood their dad and never managed to understand themselves and their relation to him. This is how it came to me because that is what he was and what I was and there are also things that I have and can't let go because in some way they are a conduit of communication a way of holding on to something that is already gone or only a remaining unmet need. - carl

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for sharing these thoughts, carl.
And I wonder what was never resolved of unmet needs on both sides of our coin.
appreciate you, my poetic friend.
j.

[John the Baptist]

A father's day poem that touches upon the relationship between fathers and sons very perceptively. Perhaps neither really understands completely the needs and expectations of the other. On the other hand, loyalty covers a lot of gaps.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, John.
j.

[DIVYA]

Sometimes, we feel unable to express our feelings and choose gifts that are suitably formal, distant. A tie is a perfect example of this. But you are certainly not concealing your feelings in this poem and your love for your father comes through in rushing oceans! I hope you return soon!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Divya.
j.

[redd Brick Keshner]

I get that love is never just in grand gestures or perfect understanding. It exists in trying, in showing up, in the willingness to offer something, even if it isn’t exactly right. And even when words were unspoken, even when there were things left misunderstood, love was still there. Sometimes, it takes time to see that. Sometimes, it lingers in the smallest things—a worn tie, a steady hand, the simple truth that you mattered, even when neither of you knew quite how to say it. We carry love forward, and that is a gift in itself. imo Thanks for the superb read🕊️🙏🏻

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your insightful review, Freds,
j.

[redd Brick Keshner]

Most welcome j🕊️🙏🏻
Freds.

[Buddhistboy73]

Mmm...a deep write about the father/son bond here.....:)

How can we as the youth possibly understand what our father expects of us ...?
Many emotions arise from this poem so thanks for sharing....

For me these lines sum up our "awkward" relationships with our fathers....

i only gave you ties
but made so many awkward knots
in them
with my naivety

BB73

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your very kind review, BB73.

[Desert Knave]

This is awesome. I never knew what to get Dad, so the same things showed up year after year. ~Jim

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, easiest gifts, ties...even when we were two small to buy the gifts ourselves...ties.
j.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Wow what a deep personal moving emotional poem
I love it one of your best
Great metaphors catchy rhymes with meanings eg ties lies
Perfect 👍

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you so much, Julie.
j.