Drowning

While everyone else swims.

I'm tired.

But not the kind of tired that sleep can fix.

I'm drowning.

Like trying to swim while tied down to bricks.

I'm broken.

The weight crushing my chest and tearing my limbs.

I'm dying.

Underwater while everyone learns how to swim.

Reviews

[Jordan]

Got the feeling of water in my lungs just reading it.

It's almost peaceful. I know it's intended to be in a negative light, but something about how you wrote it makes just giving up and slipping away under the water seems like a happy ending. Or maybe I'm weird.

Overall it's a good poem. No issues with grammar or structure. As for concept and meaning, poetry is subjective so I don't review that aspect like other people do.

5/5

[hanir]

Very real. You gave a vivid description on a strenous struggle to survive. Nicely written.

[sinNsincerity]

I totally feel this tiredness, weakness, and achingness every single day and moment. It's quite a dread, I guess it comes with the miles I've placed upon my soul. I stopped trying to swim, or search for a life raft. I just allow the tides and currents take me as they please...
Amazing write Ms. Gabiamee!

[Coyote Poetry]

I understand this feeling. Easy to drown in life and the struggle of life. I did like the closing line. We must swim or give in. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote