8

Jump back to the moment when Kyle went out of Mary’s sight. He did take heed of her advice by taking a different route home. During the three years of living in Mayfield, he had come to know all the roads, back alleys, and property lines by heart.  If he saw a dark blue convertible come from any way, he knew that he could easily find a means of escape. Unless fate fucked things up, Kyle knew he had a forty-eight hour hiatus but he knew his rash, reckless action demanded a swift, strong reaction. Knowing that Weezer always hung around with Wings and Moby didn't help his chances either.  Kyle soon realized he was out of sight of Mary’s house. He cut between a red dwelling and a blue dwelling, both of them single floor homes. He dodged from backyard to backyard and from street to street. He took his time because of parental indifference. Personal reflection was the only other activity he could engage in on the way back.

            The hatred he encountered upon coming Mayfield had arrived from nowhere.  It was first believed that it was new kid syndrome, the idea that a youngster from the outside would be ostracized upon entering a new setting.  He fit the one-dimensional stereotype of a geek but that didn't mean he wasn't entitled to basic respect. It had started with his classmates in the seventh grade and it spread like an incurable contagion to the eighth graders. It became unreal when he met Weezer for the first time. Weezer was a freshmen and at the top of the junior high pecking order. When knowledge of Kyle's existence came to Weezer’s ears, he was on Kyle like white on chalk. He was swiftly merciless about it, too. By the next year, Weezer had moved on to the secondary school and Kyle was almost free of the distasteful swine. Weezer was a persistent a*****e and he always managed to give Kyle a truckload of problems outside of school. The troubles became more progressive as Kyle wandered up the food chain and that was only one angle of hatred in Mayfield.

            The other angle of hatred in Mayfield sprouted from an adult source, Coach Edward Gregson. Edward Gregson was the master coach who had brought a perennially losing football program from basement to the attic in only two years. His first season brought about a five hundred record, a third place regional finish, and trip to the playoffs. His second season gave Mayfield its first ever regional champion trophy and state-third place finish. Over the next twelve years, he would bring six state titles and twelve more regional championships. Gregson's ability to win made him the top dog among the school faculty. If anybody ever screwed with him, they were figuratively shredded into dog food. To Kyle, it wasn't surprising that nobody ever stepped in to stop the coach from condoning for such trauma. Even less surprising was the relationship that Gregson had with his players. Think Varsity Blues but Jon Voight isn't seen as an a*****e among the ideal minds of his players. After Kyle saw the film, he immediately realized that West Canaan had been transplanted into the cornfields of west central Indiana.  Living in this football hamlet meant if you were not in the coach's back pocket, you never got away with anything. Kyle was being unfairly dumped upon and the educators would rather be bootlicks to their athletic handler than be practitioners of a fair and balanced school environment. He felt powerless and his rightful anger was never addressed. He was shoved to the side like a pair of once-used football cleats. The problems from those angles could have been addressed if he received support from his place of safety.

            Kyle's home life was the last place he had ever expected to find a lack of support and love.  While living in Terre Haute, life had always been good and the love and support were always kosher or so he thought. Life had dramatically changed when Kyle found out that both his parent's businesses were failing to break even and it had been their second year in a row. With no choice but to declare bankruptcy, the mood had suddenly changed. They were forced to seek jobs with already established firms.  It seemed that nobody was willing to lend a helping hand. The Dawson clan was almost out of luck when job offers came their way from the city council of Mayfield. The town needed both an experienced lawyer and accountant to deal with day-to-day issues and operations in the fields of finance and law. Without really mulling over the consequences, they jumped at the opportunity, packed up everything, and headed north. The transition from Terre Haute to Mayfield had been especially difficult on everyone. It fell upon Kyle the hardest. His permanent new kid syndrome had an unexpected side effect: it was the parental love loss at home and he couldn't explain it. When he inquired about it, he was met with a hostility he hadn’t seen before. A really weak acid had been eating away at the family bond and it finally fissured with their arrival in Mayfield. This was life, as Kyle knew it to be, when he reached his sophomore year of high school.

            On the long walk (or more like not the long enough walk home), Kyle mulled about the town of Mayfield itself. He believed the town was the black hole where all happiness disappeared. To be happy, you needed to have pigskin passion and make it your religion. Kyle wondered if some floating, intangible monstrosity had made the town its home and it fed on the very soul that made the town exist. The monster then gave the town a large, pointy red leather thing as repayment for the nourishment. Kyle couldn't explain the mentality that drove the young people to hate him and the adults who subtly refused to help him. Something was wrong and Kyle couldn't locate of root of it.  The cruelty at school and lack of backing at home tore at Kyle like a rusty machete.  A soul like his could be found in every town, in every county, and in every state. He would be voted "most likely to shoot up his school". Kyle's moral compass pointed him away from such a barbaric act to a more realistic conclusion. He should take a sharp knife and stab a football before a crowd of Mayfield residents. If the town realized that there immortal football coach and quarterback were really fakes and those who followed them were a bunch of brainless rejects, he would have a smile as wide as the Wabash. Pigskin pride was the reason no one paid attention to his mistreatment and he wanted so badly to see it brought to its knees.

            Kyle arrived home sometime before 6pm. He went in through the back door and he saw his mother talking on the phone. She had been so distracted by the call that she hadn’t noticed him. Kyle could only hear his mother's end.

            "Look, Senator Dorsey, if the legislature votes to pass that cut in the mill levy, our town will be forced to close its school. The cuts in the federal funding have already hurt us. If the mill levy goes next, we will be in a ball of hurt…Senator, the money we receive from athletics come from the townspeople out of their own pockets…Sir, there is a tradition of winning here in Mayfield that has been kept up for fifteen years…Your constituents, sir, are not in favor of cutting the mill levy. The townspeople already pay high property taxes to support the school…I understand, senator, but Mayfield isn't just a football school, it is an actual educational institution…If the school closes, Mayfield will have to merge with another district…Sir, the school has an academic prowess that is almost unmatched by any other institution in this part of Indiana…" she stopped for a second. 

            "Senator, voting yes on the mill levy measure will not only destroy this school district but others in the state as well. I implore you not to pass the mill levy measure…Thank you for your time, Senator Dorsey." Danielle hung up the phone after that.

            Kyle had been standing by the refrigerator drinking a cold beverage and smiling at his mother's dismay. She still hadn’t detected him since she was staring at the wall.

            "The citizens of this state elected a died-in-the-wool conservative Republican whose platform was to lower taxes to represent our district. The little glitch is that this state has a nice size budget deficit to try and get out of. Since the governor was so wise to promise tax cuts without fully considering the state's fiscal situation, he has made the ball of hurt bigger. To keep his poll numbers high, he keeps his promise and tries to find ways that he can f**k the system over and stay in office. Where does he cut first?  Education funding, of course, because having an education means nothing in the working world. Slash the mill levy and you got a pile of money to give a refund of $50 to any non-dependent taxpayer.

            "I swear the idiot we have sitting in governor's office is a few cards short of a deck. The decks are even shorter for members of the same party who supported the lower tax platform. Do the math and use your heads before you make financial decisions that affect others, you inept morons!" Danielle stated at great length.

            A big smile came across his face, "Let the school close then. Those two-faced, spineless secondary educators can end up jobless for all I care. They don't deserve respect anyway."

            Danielle never expected such a condescending remark from her son. "How dare you say that? What gives you the right to make such a harsh comment against your school?" she growled angrily.

            "How about three years of constant emotional abuse at the hands of my peers! How about three years of blind eye casting by the educators who are supposed to provide me with a safe learning environment!" Kyle replied harshly.

            "You do know what you’re talking about, Kyle. Mayfield High School has a great athletic and academic tradition!" Danielle responded hastily.

            "Yeah, because a lobotomized monkey could pass those really lame standardized tests they give us. Last year when I took that brain-draining exam, I finished in the 95th percentile. Most of my class finished above the 70th percentile. Either the scoring was screwed up or the test was just not challenging enough. As for athletics, this school sucks in all other sports. All the funding goes to the football program. We are a group of perennial losers no matter how you slice it. We are only recent in terms of being a football powerhouse. I can name other schools in this state that aren't fakes like Mayfield!" Kyle came back with at considerable length.

            "Kyle, you should have pride in your hometown! You should be defending it even if you think the cons outweigh the pros."

            He went on at length, "Mom, you are so full of s**t! Mayfield is the black hole of the Corn Belt. There is no happiness in this town, the pride exhibited in this god-forsaken s**t-splat is fake and it's all for a f*****g ball. This town sold its soul to Edward Gregson in return for a shot at gridiron glory. Now, the town's true symbol, the school, is nothing more than a wasteland full of hypocrites and haters.  I have been in that school and I have been slammed against lockers, called horrid names, had my books knocked on the floor numerous times. I have had my locker booby trapped on several occasions and I always look over my shoulder when I walk home. 

            "I come home every damn day to the same people who supposedly have the title of parents. I guess the both of you just being here counts as being good parents. I don't hear the phrases 'I love you' or 'you are best son in the world' come from your lips. All I get is flack for asking you to be at my football games and I get no response when I tell you about my miseries and pains at school. I live in a state of constant dejection and there is no logical explanation for why it is this way. Can you explain it?"

            The pointed question made Danielle squirm.

            "What do you want to tell me, Mom? I am all ears. I have been in the dark way too long," Kyle reiterated.

            Danielle wouldn't budge at all.

            "Out with it, Mom! You owe your child an explanation! If your parents did the same s**t to you, wouldn't you want to know the truth? Why am I so damn miserable?" Kyle asked a third time.

            Danielle had tears welling up in her eyes.

            "Answer me!" Kyle screamed.

            "That's enough!" a louder voice thundered behind him.  Kyle immediately turned around and saw his father's angry expression. It bore resemblance to a bear being stirred from hibernation in the middle of winter. Kyle immediately backed down as his father approached him.

            "How dare you berate your mother like that! What gives you the right to question how your life has turned out, huh?" Aaron's pace had quickened.

            Kyle was struck mute by the remark.

            "Answer me! Answer me now!" Aaron hollered.

            And Kyle still couldn't respond.

            Aaron showed his vehemence, "We have provided enough for you to eat well, to sleep well, to be properly educated, to be athletically motivated, and to be entertained. We provide for you therefore we love you. Get that through your thick skull!"

            Kyle had built up a strong resistance in his three years in Mayfield.  He was about to open to his mouth when Aaron went telekinetic.

            His tone had significantly sharpened, "As for school, Kyle, I suggest you avoid trouble. Learn to blend into the background and simply watch your back. The football players rule that school so I suggest you use that smart brain of yours to find ways to go about unnoticed."

            Kyle was horrified at what he was hearing.  His own father was flat out telling him to become a ghost. Kyle didn't believe in ghosts so he didn’t have a reference point to go from. Kyle had tried to go unobserved initially but Weezer made it clear on the first day of secondary school that he would not be that unknown, quiet kid in school. He ended up head first in a toilet.

            Kyle tried to speak in his own defense, "Dad, what the…"

            Aaron was quick to nullify any mutinous tendencies, "Don't question me! Don't question your mother! The rules we have set forth are not to be hemmed and hawed about ever again! They are not to be questioned ever again either! Do I make myself clear?"

            Kyle breathed slowly and nodded his head.

            Aaron voiced angrily, "Good man! Now apologize to your mother and get out of my sight!"

            Aaron backed down to let Kyle by. He was an attack dog at the ready as his only spawn stood in front of Danielle.

            Kyle commented without emotion, "I am sorry, Mom."

            Danielle dried her eyes with her sleeve, "Kyle, we work almost 80 hours a week for this town and we put a lot into it. All we ask for is some respect from you. I still don't know why you say you are miserable but your father and I aren't. I suggest you change your attitude and make the best of your school situation because we are not leaving Mayfield anytime soon. Now go to your room."

            Kyle didn't even try to react for fear of beastly retribution. He backed out of the kitchen and wandered toward his room. His room was right across the hall from the master bedroom on the main level. Kyle slowly closed the door and landed on his bed.  Slowly, after some time had passed, he began to cry. This time, the tears refused to cease.  Even with a beautiful and awesome female in his life, he still wasn't as happy as he wanted to be. The intensity of his sobbing would have brought any caring parent into the room. His parents weren't caring since the last time they told him they loved him. That happened the last Christmas before they moved to Mayfield.

            Kyle’s very limited knowledge of finance couldn't let him completely understand the unrest that would ensue over the next year. It turned out that that his Christmas presents that year were all bought on credit. Without the assets to payback the creditors, his parents had to fold up shop. He vividly remembered hearing his mother and father arguing with bank reps and creditors about paying back mortgages, credit card bills, and the like. His parents, both racked with stress and guilt began to treat Kyle differently but it was very, very subtle. He never received a kiss in the morning from his mother and big hug from his father when he came home from school when it all began. They began to cut themselves off from him by refusing to ask him pertinent questions about his life. There was chatter between the three of them but it became more and more sporadic.

            At the time, Kyle obviously knew something was very wrong but his future hadn't happened yet. It finally happened when a bank agent came by with an order of repossession. Kyle watched as his dad very reluctantly handed over the keys to their home. Aaron was shaking with a heavy fear of the unknown. Danielle was crying in a way that meant certain doom. That was moment he knew he needed a new definition for normalcy and it would be on the negative side of the battery known as his life.

            Kyle returned his thoughts to the present and he stared the ceiling. He rolled over on his side and he so badly wanted to pick up the phone that lay on his bedside table.  With his parents on a rampage, being in contact with her on this evening would pose a probable health risk. As sad as he was, he couldn't cry anymore. He looked at the infamous football that he had dropped at the foot of his bed when he had come into the room. He sighed several times over. Was the football really just a cheap memory? It was a personal high for him that he hadn't experienced in such a long time. Catching a touchdown pass and a two-point pass to win a very, very close football game wasn't a cheap memory as far as he was concerned. With the events that happened in his life, it was equivalent to buying an engagement band for his beloved. He wanted to keep that football because he honestly believed he deserved it and he didn't have any happy mementos from the last three years of his less than harmonious existence. He leaned back once more and stared at the ceiling. He reached over to his bedside table and turned on his radio. 

            Without prior warning, a melodious and oddly menacing acoustic guitar riff filled his ears. The song began to lull him into a state of relative calm. The words came on in front of the melodious, menacing riff and he found the song speaking to him. The message shot through him like a smack hit to a heroin addict. The song spoke of anguish, suffering, and hatred. It was the swan song of an abuse victim and it made him realize that the world was full of the hopeless souls like his. As the song came to an end, he fell asleep for the first time without crying in a long time.

            Now, jump back to the moment Kyle had exited the kitchen.

            Aaron glared down the hall and he viewed Kyle’s bedroom door close ever so slightly. Danielle was still sitting in her chair while wiping her eyes with her shirt sleeve.  When the door clicked, Aaron stood over the glass-top range and pushed his hands into the hard object. He curled his fingers several times as a solid rage slowly overtook the middle-aged man.

            Aaron began gradually and calmly, “That kid of ours is the biggest f*****g liability we have. Why can’t we cut him loose?”

            Danielle had finally stopped sobbing, she was silent as well, “The great unraveling would then occur, Aaron. I thought you understood that?”

            Bile entered Aaron’s throat, “I don’t really care anymore, Danielle. I haven’t cared since we had the little b*****d. I am ailing from this farce and I want to be done with it.”

            Bile also surfaced in Danielle’s throat, “I can whistle that same tune and you know the feeling is damn well mutual. I detest that mistake as much as you do.”

            “Why did you have him then? What thought entered that little mind of yours to make you go through with the pregnancy?”

            “You know the f*****g reason, Aaron. You avoid a certain end of this shithole with fear greater than the one you have for the Almighty.”

            “I know that reason and I know it well. I revisit it every year exactly one month before the little s**t-for-brains was born. Why the f**k did you keep him after the fact?”

            Danielle shrugged her shoulders, “I can’t say, honey bear. That reason has certainly eluded me for the longest time.”

            Aaron put forth a derisive snicker, “Sixteen years is a long time to keep up with a lie. Isn’t it, Danielle?”

            Danielle shrugged once more, “I can’t say anything about that, either. I know if Kyle puts up another fight like that again, I will kill him. I will harm him and I don’t care what anybody thinks or says and I certainly don’t care what happens to me.”

            Aaron walked toward his wife and got down on his knees, “Leave that to me, sweet thing. If he f***s with us once more, I will make sure there are loopholes protecting us from any criminal charges. We have worked this hard to scratch out a living in this viper pit and I refuse to let our b*****d of a son ruin it.”

            Aaron kissed Danielle softly on the lips.  He soon continued conversing, “The truth will stay with us and it shall never be revealed. If he does find out from someone else, we shall forsake the little f**k. We shall reach that point when it happens. When it does, he is on his own and the legal system can go sodomize itself in the eyeballs with a rusty tent spike.”

            They beamed at one another and slowly smooched once more. Aaron reached over to the nearby light switch and clicked it off.