Lake of Fire

Lake of Fire

I'm stagnant - filled with chaos, demons, pain - I welcome the darkness,

That torments my sanity with agony - creating a battlefield of jumbled thoughts,

My black heart, barely beating lies beneath the surface of bittersweet memories,

That consumes me, filling me with fear, fear of living one more day without you.

I feel stranded, without hope, without direction and it’s too late to save me,

From the hollow loneliness that echoes through the existence of my tortured soul,

Alone, losing myself - wasting away, hidden from the outside world,

Filled with shards of anger and dread and the stillness that encompasses who I am.

How many casualties will I take along with me on my journey to the lake of fire,

Pulling them in my grasp of extreme madness - leading them through the shadows,

To the tomb of my heart - shrouded in the dark mist from the cemetery of my life,

As I fall apart from the distress, the sadness that gives way to the heavy depression,

Where every day I face it again, and again - I just want to silence my mind....

               3/16/2018

Author's Note

Been in a dark place lately.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I'm sorry to hear about your darkness. I've suffered from depression about half my life, so I very much understand how it can be. Your writing is still very artful & descriptive, despite your "blah" state of mind. Many who write about depression sound like a mindless dump. It takes honest observation to capture things in creative ways, as you have here. I love this line: "How many casualties will I take along with me on my journey to the lake of fire" . . . the reason I don't want to be around others when I feel this way . . . don't want to bring people down. I also like the contrast of your title line (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Ghost]

Thank you so much.. I hate when I feel like this but I take what I feel and try to paint a description of it as best as I can... Thank you for commenting

[sette]

try to fight it off my friend

[Ghost]

Thank you, I am fighting as best as I can and I do have a friend who checks on me..

[sette]

that is good to know just hang in there

[Cherrie]

It's odd how depression can go from a seldom occurance to a heartless task master.
You have laid it all out there. Now you just have to force yourself to a day trip in the light.

[Ghost]

Thank you for commenting.. I sometimes have better days than others but the dark days hit with the force of a tornado, hurricane, typhoon, all rolled into one.. And there is no spirit left in me when it takes hold... Thank you again

[Cherrie]

I get that feeling sometimes, shower, shave and try something new. :)