Cowards and Heroes

short story.

A wise man once said, "If there were no cowards, we wouldn't have heroes." So I'm a coward. I have many fears that will probably never go away. I have fears for my future. Is all the hard work I am putting into my schedule for nothing? I have fears for my happiness. Will I ever be truly happy with the way I look and the way I am? I have fears that I will never speak up. Am I going to be quiet for ever? And most upsetting, what if no one wants to listen?
I work super hard to get straights A's and to stay in my honors classes. Last year, I did amazing as a student. As a friend? Not so much. It's as if I forgot how to talk, because when it was all over--when all the work was finished--I had no one to talk to and no one to laugh with and I was lonely. I was shy and I did not know what to say to people. I was afraid to speak.
I'm trying to make friends this year and change my personality but I couldn't believe how huge a hole I'd dug myself into. It's as if I was in a pit and I couldn't climb out of it. I was like the fake smile on the highway billboard. Everyone knows its just for the show--and how's that gonna sell? Not too well. Anyways, I needed a change. I needed to breathe. I needed to talk to someone. It's boring to be all alone. It's boring not to have someone to laugh with and share stories with. Who wants to be boring?
I just hope that it all works out this year, because if it doesn't, who will be my hero?