Humpty Dumpty

another quickie I wrote

Call the king's horses,

Call the king's men.

I've fallen from heartbreak,

And I cant't get up again.

The shattered pieces,

What remains of me.

Littered on the street,

I just sat there and let them be.

The water round me,

So deep and blue.

Tempting too.

I want to fling myself into the ocean,

And never see day again.

Scraping along the ground,

Picking up whatever pieces there.

Hopeless, I'll never, ever be able

To be whole. Or emotionally stable.

Call the king's horses,

Call the king's men.

I've fallen from heartbreak,

And I'll never get up again.

Author's Note

couldn't find a picture for this one haha

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i really like the idea of this one...and it reads well except for two parts...

end of first stanza might be smoother if: "I've fallen from heartbreak/ and can't get up again"

and at the end..."I've fallen from heartbreak/ and will never get up again."

just thoughts...but i really like this use of Humpty Dumpty to tell a tragic love story.

[Aysia]

Thank you so much for your constructive review ! :)