Heartbeat.

That cool Saturday night, 

I rested my lamenting head

     on your chest, and

My pillow had a heartbeat.

I memorized, analyzed.

Chose never to forget its music

"Thud-thud, thud thud."

In one more full moon I'll never hear it again.

That'll be the end of dumb arguments
And bad movies
And jealous speculation of
True thoughts we keep hidden, locked inside.

But the heart cannot lie.

I heard yours tell me the truth I craved.

I'll cling to it for now:

"Thud-thud, Thud-thud
I-do, love-you
I-always, was-true
I-won't, for-get
The-taste, of-kiss
And-our, shared-bliss."

[Yeah, your heart speaks in poetry.]

Reviews

[Silvia - Scribo, Ergo S..]

... and my pillow had a heartbeat - what a wonderful way of putting it!

Splendid little love poem! Love it. xxx

One thing though: Maybe I just need glasses, but the script is so small, I had difficulty reading it. One size larger maybe (for old bats like me)?

[Shantanu]

Good poem. I specially liked the part
"That'll be the end of dumb arguments
And bad movies
And jealous speculation of
True thoughts we keep hidden, locked inside." -- these lines really flow very well into each other. And nice way of expressing what you wanted to convey

[Barry S. Maltese]

What a cute poem. I like how you interpreted the sounds of his heartbeat. Nicely written.

[Red Raven]

This remind me of Green day's number.
Sad but we all can always wait.
Nice work.

[J. Hampton]

Absence ...........
makes the heart go "CRAZY"
not fonder.

you kep it real...
how it is to be....mesmerized
transfixed.
how we ache for that and cling


Blessssssssssssssssssssss

[Whisperer]

This is a really nice poem. Sweet in a matter-of-fact way...

Though the subdued melancholy in this piece is evident, I think, the sound of 'Thud-thud' for the heart-beat adds some humor to it.

These lines add depth to your poem -

"And jealous speculation of

True thoughts we keep hidden, locked inside."

All said and done, a very nice poem.

P.S. On my browser, the font size has come out a little too large.

[Chantal-lise Mirman]

What a heart-felt (pun intended) poem. I think we've all known the feeling of trying to listen directly to the language of the heart. You translate it so well for us with your two-beat doubled words:

"Thud-thud, Thud-thud

I-do, love-you

I-always, was-true

I-won't, for-get

The-taste, of-kiss

And-our, shared-bliss."


This has a wistful tone, yet a refreshing honesty. A very nice take on "Good-bye."

It might better suit the poem and enhance the flow to break the first line into two at the comma:

"That cool Saturday night,
I rested my lamenting head on your chest
And my pillow had a heartbeat."

Loved this, and will save it to my library!

[Silvia - Scribo, Ergo S..]

oh, thanks. short-sighted my can read it much better now ...LOL ... still a lovely poem.