Robot

I don’t know whether to be myself

Or to hold back

I always either give too much

Or too little

 

Either my walls are up

Or my mouth won’t shut up

I either scare or push everyone away

Even when I don’t intend to

 

That hostile glare

Is my defense mechanism

Because I can’t relive that pain

I won’t go there again

 

Those tears in my eyes

Are symbols of my vulnerability

So easy to break

When I’m already cracked

 

I don’t know what to say

So I say nothing at all

And you probably think I’m an idiot

But I just can’t take a risk

 

I don’t know whether to be myself

I’ve learned that people don’t like that

They don’t want to know that we’re not all robots

We have emotions, but their ashamed

 

Sometimes I wonder how it would be

If the whole world could be more like me

If we were all so open

Maybe we’d become a little closer

 

But I won’t go there again

I can’t relive that pain

So I’ll just struggle to fit in

And pretend I’m a robot feeling nothing at all