A dark silently loud room Still and silent yet there's a boom Lot of unsaid things in silence Unseen moments of darkness That tear in her eyes The pain in those lies So crushing and demeaning Like the throne of a fallen king The pain and the sorrow Feeling like there's no tomorrow There's a beauty in the dark And in silence a spark The anguish of the heart Parting and a new start The need to clear the air Life's really not fair
I found a lot of confusion in the poem, which is not a bad thing. But the problem is that your poem seems unsure of its yearnings, what to look for. The promising start leading to the mushy end was the most disappointing aspect of this piece.