My Dream

I long to be doing this

But it's so far away.

A dream in the city,

So hard to be attained.

 

I've never wanted anything but this.

Nothing else has ever seemed to fit.

It's what I was made for,

But others disagree.

 

I know I could do it,

If only giving the chance.

I'd work hard,

I'm most passionate for this.

Author's Note

Little rough.

Reviews

[Joe Curtis]

I like this, it sums up how everyone feels about their passion - the mix of knowing you're made for it but also the fear you're not - without excluding ppl by saying what it is! Just a couple of things that didn't read quite right - I'd say 'attain' instead of 'be attained' and 'given' instead of 'giving'. :)

[Mir]

thank you for reviewing and giving your input! You are right, i will edit this and change those!

[Nithin Purple]

NICE ONE

[Healing Star]

Why not talk about what the dream really is.
You don't mention it so it kind of leaves this empty.
It should be "if only given the chance" not giving
I would expand on it, take out the others disagree, because they don't matter it is your dream. And share the dream, not just the outskirts of it. Do you want to Sing or be a singer?

[Mir]

That was a very insightful review, so thank you! And yea, a singer/songwriter.

[Healing Star]

That is awesome Miranda! You can make it come true, you need to stick with it. I had the thought when I was younger and did not pursue it. But many years later I am thinking about doing it again, actually I am doing it, but starting slowly. good luck, and I will watch for your work out there.

[de_maruf]

/

[Aly]

Your poetry is very honest and I can very much relate to this as I have big dreams like this to go to a city. I think you're my new best friend since you are such a great writer.

[Mir]

Aww yay! A new best friend! haha :)
I'm working on reading your requests that you sent, so don't think you're being ignored! :)

[Aly]

:D Best friend! *hugs*

[Phillitup]

its good despite the rough factor, I think that rough works for it.

[Mir]

Thank you! :)