Falling.......................

AM FALLING ----------------

 

Falling…………………….

 

 

 

Blank

empty

staring eyes!

Fractured

Psychedelic dreams

In splintered

Swirling darkness

            Pressure

              Writhing

                     Twisting

                   Churning

Hold on

Hang on

Dig in

Stop the fall

             Sinking

                      Slipping

                                Sliding

             Beyond the vortex

      into

                     the belly of the beast

                 where only blackness waits.

Hang on

                  Hold on

                              Dig in

     Stop

                  The

                                     Fall……………………….

 

Splintered

           Swirling darkness

                  The belly of the beast

                                  Is

                 waiting……………..

 

 

 

 

 

© Copyright Jen – JG - March 6^th 2008

 

 

 

Author's Note

Honesty works for me ---- thank you

Reviews

[Enigma]

It works for me too...
The poem's xceptionally good. with a great flow.I was getting excited as I neared the end of this 'masterpiece'.I'm just saying that you've successfully said...what you wanted to say through the use of minimum words!! That's talent...

[Shelly Wiseberg]

Well I honestly loved it! Shelly

[MandarinOranges]

This not only works for me, it speaks for me, as if you stole the emotions right from my very soul. Well, that might be a little drastic, but still...this is just AMAZING!!!

Thank you for sharing and joining the group. Good luck!

[ah]

i love the format and it is a great write, thanx for sharing, keep it up

[Alexander W. Quinn]

I haven't seen you use this type of technique before. It's a solid piece, a bit foreboding, but raw and honest. The poem is great, and I hope you're doing well.

[Phil Sanders]

It definitely works .. superb writing ......

[poddar kushal]

Splintered

Swirling darkness- a 'dark yet wating for a sunrise' poem that has a nice form and it builds a drama very well.