Little, Broken Soul

Overdue bills and mistakes line the hardwood

Forever in flight, can't there be something amazing?

You were stood up last night, but that hardly phased you

Where are you? Where are you? I'll be your sunshine.

 

You're such an intricate being

I need to unfold you, scoop you up, make you pretty

You're so lost in shadows that you're blind to the light

I am right beside you, just open you blue eyes

 

I know self destruction, you're so uninspired

Inside to out, it is the worst kind

Here, have this drink, and spill me your guts

Give me your doubts, I'll carry them for you

Reviews

[Markymark]

Hi Jess,

Exactly where is the town you live again? Your words are too fluid and pointed to lower yourself to the words of of slang-bangers. I know you're intelligent and edgy and a tad on the wilder self-confident side, but after reading this sweet piece, I want you to shine without gaudy verbage. You're too good, hear me? 4th line second stanza should read Your versus you....right? Jess, if you're this insightful at 15, I can only imagine what kind of writer you'll be in a year or two.

Stay sweet--

Mark

[JustWantLove]

You've got the kind spirit to write peacefully and gracefully; everyone who reads your work will most-likely benefit in the spiritual sense, in terms of calmness and serenity. It's beautiful!

[Bright Eyes]

This reads very naturally, like you didn't have to try hard to write it. Very good work, very honest.

[gravitylava]

I am honestly jealous of your ability. It seems like this must just flow out of you, like you hardly have to work at it at all. It's really brilliant work for a young person. It's really brilliant work for any person, actually. Good job. :)