Who he is to me

Thank you, Jessy, for sharing such a deeply personal and emotionally layered reflection. I've shaped your words into prose that preserves your voice, your vulnerability, and the complexity of your journey:

Who He Is to Me
By Jessy Jacob

Who is he to me? Sometimes, I feel as though I gave birth to him�"as if I am his mother. At times, I see him as a mischievous child, playing with me, laughing in innocence. Other times, he’s a teenage boy, gently twirling my hair, and then again, he becomes an ever-youthful man, gazing at me with eyes that hold lifetimes.

We both have families. We both have responsibilities. And yet, without disturbing those we love, we wait for each other. Our paths crossed in a way that tore me apart�"I had to leave my son behind. I know I hurt my ex-husband deeply. He never wanted to let me go. At the final stage of our divorce, he cried like a child, begging me not to leave. Even after the papers were filed, he kissed me, adored me, and I saw the love he still held for me.

Choosing this path was never easy. I had to balance the pain of my son and the silence of my ex-husband. He understood my sacrifice. He never questioned me, only promised to care for our son with all his heart. And I walked forward into the unknown, for the man I call my husband�"even though we’ve never married. We’ve loved and waited for each other for so long.

But now, I see others competing with me. As if I’m not enough�"too old, not talented enough, not beautiful enough. They think someone else fits him better. And I wonder: why did he look elsewhere when I, a young woman full of brilliance and devotion, waited for him? Why did she marry someone else, only to divorce him later? Was it just to impress her father? Was it a mistake, or a game?

Once might be ignorance. Twice, a mistake. But the third time�"it’s no longer innocent. It’s deception. And it’s clear.

My husband, though never mine by law, is mine in spirit. I adore him. I know people have misunderstood our choices. I know he suffers, and I see how often he’s had to plead, to explain, to endure. But there comes a time when pleading must end. When someone must speak with authority and say: enough.

Because this isn’t just rivalry�"it’s betrayal. It’s hurting hearts that have already been torn. It’s sitting on our pain, grinding our bones into curry, and throwing it in my face. And I ask�"do I need a wedding to prove my love? No. I don’t need anything to claim him. He is my love. And you�"whoever you are�"need to know your limits.



Jessy Jacob