She Hails From Portland

Short Story on taking chances and fulfilling lifelong dreams

By Judy Getty

 

      The smell of fresh cut grass wafted through the air as I drove out of my neighborhood towards the center part of town.  It was the first nice day of the year, a time in mid February and a day that I looked forward to every year.  When winter loses its grip and spring gains a foothold. 

     “Julie,” I said aloud to my self, “You surely are a spring time girl.”

     I smile as the winter sun warms me through the window of my jeep.  I’m going to miss this car, I thought briefly.  But even the paint color on my car seems to be pushing me in a new direction.  Pacific Blue, it’s called.  I had noticed it on the paperwork my mechanic handed to me last week when I had it in for service, another omen.

     I slid into a spot and put the car in park. I didn’t see Beth’s Honda and as usual I was the first to arrive.  Beth was busy, her life full of her daughter and her grandchildren and their activities.  I treasured my busy friend and looked forward to seeing her, knowing that our times together were few. This made our meetings especially precious to me.  Seeing Beth was a gift in itself.  

     The little coffee shop was charming.  The door tinkled when I opened it, the cluster of little bells hanging from a red ribbon in the window alerted the barista of my arrival.

    “Hello Frannie,” I call out. “I’m going to wait for Beth before I order.” 

     “Okay, Mrs. Sandoval.  Isn’t the sunshine wonderful today?” 

     “Can you believe it? I am so- loving this day,” I answer and head for my favorite seat. 

     The coffee shop has two high backed over stuffed chairs placed on each side of the gas fireplace.  They are the kind of chairs that swallow you up in comfort, an invitation to settle in with a, can’t- put- down really good novel and a cup of coffee.   A multitude of candles adorn the mantle. The walls are painted a soft butter.  Today, I notice a new arrangement.  A springtime bouquet of tulips, pansies and daffodils are in the center of the carved mantle.  I rise and walk to the flowers reaching out to stroke the velvety petals and breathe in their light clean scent.  Spring flowers make me think of new beginnings and earth reborn.

     The door tinkles and there is Beth.  As usual she is breathless as if she has just finished a marathon and I am flattered that she has hurried, just to see me.       

     “Hi Julie, sorry I’m late.  I took Emma to see the Hannah Montana Movie this afternoon and then Matthew needed a ride over to Michelle’s.  Matt and Michelle are so cute, it’s their anniversary today.  They’ve been dating a year now.  I can’t believe how fast my grandchildren are growing up.” 

Beth continued to fill me in on her day as we walked up to the counter to order.

     “Hello Beth, it’s good to see you.  Do you both want mocha’s today?” asked Frannie.

     “You know us so well,” I laugh. 

      Frannie smiled, “Go ahead and decide on the cookies and I’ll get your coffees started.” 

She turned her back to us and began to make our drinks.

    Beth asked me, “Which ones look good to you?”

     I looked at the cookies wrapped in cellophane, two to each package lying nestled in the tray on the counter.  The gingersnaps looked delicious with their rich familiar dark color and molasses aroma, sprinkled with a dusting of sugar that danced like crystals in the sunlight.  

     “Let’s go with the sugar cookies today shall we?” I answer her. 

     She smiled at me, looking into my eyes and her joy went straight to my heart as she plucked the cookies from the tray to add to our order.  The Sugars were Beth’s favorite.   I smile to myself, happy to be here in this place with my friend.

     We took our cookies and drinks over to the chairs by the fireplace.  The mocha was warm and soothing on my throat as I settle in and take my first sip.  I linger over the flavor.  Beth bit into her cookie. 

     “So Julie, how are you doing?”  Beth asked me. 

     “I have big news,” I answer. I raise my eyebrows and start to chew on my straw.

     “What is it?  I can tell this is going to be good.”

     “Well, I’ve put the house up for sale.  I just listed it this morning.”

    “Wow, good for you Julie!  That place is too big for you now. Are you going to look at Condo’s?”

      “Yes, that’s my plan. Although I want to wait until the house sells.  I don’t want to mess with contingencies and such.”

     “Did you get the life insurance yet?  Have they sent it to you?”

     “Yes, I got the check two days ago.”

     “Well, why don’t you just use that and we can start looking right away. I’m going with you of course.  I love looking at houses.  We could invite your sister Meredith.  Nothing she enjoys more than looking at houses.  Does she still drag Bart out every Sunday to look at homes?  Where do you want to move to?  You’re going to stay in Gresham aren’t you?”

     “I think I’m going to expand my search a little bit.”

    “What do you mean?”

     “Well, my friend, I’m thinking Maui.”

     “Julie!  No!  You can’t move to Maui!”

      “Why not?”

     “You can’t.  I would miss you too much.  Honey, Frank just died and he was sick for a long time.  You’re making a rash decision.  What about your children and your family?  What about me and your job?”

    “Beth, I know that Frank just died and that he was sick for a long time. I lived it, remember?  I miss him so much.”

     “I know you do. It’s been so hard for you.”

      “I’m still recovering from losing him. I’m so utterly lost and lonely without him. But it isn’t just that.  I have spent my whole life being a part of everyone else’s dreams and life plans. I’m not complaining, don’t get me wrong. Being a wife and mother was my decision and my commitment and a joy, most of the time, but now, right now, in this moment of my life I have a chance, to follow my heart and my dreams.  You know our favorite saying, ‘There aren’t any do-overs.’  This is it, right now, decision time for me and it’s not a dress rehearsal.  This is my one and only chance.” 

     “Can you afford it?”

     “Probably not, but I’m going to try. I thought I would look for a little condo and then find a job.  I’m not young and cute enough to find employment on the water front but I can certainly scoop ice cream or wait tables or something three streets back.”

    Beth laughed, “Oh Julie, you’re so funny. You’re starting to make your funny little jokes again.”

      “I’m serious,   I’m only 45 and that doesn’t seem so old to me.  Hey, maybe I can even get a job on one of the whale watching excursion boats.  Hand out sodas or something.  Then I could be out on the water every day.”

     “You are serious aren’t you?  What about Troy and Libby? How can you just move away and leave them?  What about when they have children?  You wouldn’t be able to be around your grandchildren.”

     I sigh, “Beth, on the weekend’s my phone doesn’t ring.  My children have busy full lives.  You know what I did while Frank was sick? While he slept I looked out the window at the gray and I watched for my neighbors, both widows.  I saw no sign of life.  They continue to live in their big houses alone, doing who knows what, all day long.  I pictured them sitting there waiting for their children to call.  The friends I know that do see their grandkids are in the role of glorified babysitter. 

     “Now, wait a minute Julie,”

     “Not you silly, I don’t mean you.  You’re the exception.  It’s just that lives are so busy nowadays for the young.   I visualize my future here and it looks bleak.  I can’t envision a full life here.  The rain and the cold grey skies beat me down.  Look at today. I see spring. It’s just around the corner and for the first time in months I’m starting to feel alive.  Do you understand?”

      Beth leaned back in her chair and drank from her cup taking a moment to let my news sink in.

     “I hear you Jules.  It’s just a shock and I don’t want to lose you. You’re like my sister.”

      “We’re better than sisters because we picked each other out in 2^nd grade.  Beth, tell me you’ll look after my kids.  Libby will be okay, I know she will.  She’s strong.  It’s Troy I’m worried about.  Keep an eye on him for me won’t you?  Can I tell him that you will be there for him?”

    “You know I will be.”

     “I know. You always are. That’s why I picked the sugar cookies,” I joked.  “It’s my hope that when he comes to visit me, he might stay and start a new life there.  He would come alive with the ocean and the fishing.  He just doesn’t know that it’s out there- that life is out there waiting for him.”

    I watched Beth as she rolled the cellophane wrapper from the cookies in a circle on the table beside her.  I smiled to myself. I had stunned her so badly that she had finished both cookies by herself.

     “Have you told them yet?”

     “No, not about Maui but they know I’m selling the house. They think it’s a good idea. I will tell them this week.  I’ll invite them to a family dinner or something.”

     “Financially, you mentioned you didn’t know if you could afford it.  You could lose everything.” 

      “I could.  It’s true. But if I fail, I can come back here, rent an apartment, get a job and work in a dull office for the rest of my life.  Hey- sounds like my life now!” I laugh.

“Beth, if I don’t do this, I’ll never know.  I could sit here the rest of my days existing one day to the next wondering what would have happened if I had just gone for it.  I don’t want to live a life of regret.”

     “Unfulfilled dreams?” she asks me.

    “Exactly, sure death to a dreamer.”

     “That you are dear friend.  That you are.”

     “What am I?”

     “You’re a dreamer.  And you know what?  The world needs more like you.”

      “You’re my best friend.”

      “I love you too.  Is Don Ho still alive?” she asks me.

     “Wrong Island.”

    “Oh.”

     “Beth, I’m scared.”

      “I know you are, but it’s okay to be scared sometimes.  I’m here to hold you up and I’ll be there to catch you if you fall. But I know you won’t fail.  I know you.  You never have in the past so no reason to start now.  I’ll visit you know.”

     “I’ll get you an air mattress and we’ll welcome the morning drinking Hawaiian coffee on my lanai. I’d like to open a little coffee shop/book store in Lahaina.  What do you think?”

     “I’ve had your coffee-you’ll do well.”