Happy birthday, darling

A Story by Jing

Found this in my old journals too

Happy birthday darling.
And so i blow out the candles for you
Just glad that your still living and your happy
you have too little candles on your cake,
you may not be here,
but i am used to silent birthdays
maybe somehow you are, you could feel it
i shouldnt eat the cake.
Its yours,
i should keep a slice
but when can i give you?
when will that door open again?
each candle represent one of our happy memories.
i count and recount
indeed, there is short of alot more of candles!
we have spend so many time together
this few miserable candles are nothing
maybe thats why memories are stored in candles, they burn out fast
fascinating to look but soon you forget
they will dissapear.
you may try hard to remember
but they are gone when you blow out the candles.
It hurts, when you try to put yourself back into your memories
it hurts
you must not be living in the past.
in this delusional world.
so, should i let the candles burn out by itself or blow it out myself?

11.57pm

11.58pm

11.59pm

12am

happy birthday to you

but it wasnt the candles that went out by itself
or i blew it out
it was being dampen by my tears