intersection

07/2012

                                         if I can conquer the darkness of a lifetime

                                        can I not reach beyond the stars in faith

and take a hold of the reins that guide 

all these untouchable things

                                         using my gifts within to shape a new day

                                        am I able to rebuild or is it just a waste

due to the strain of a mediocre life 

seemingly impossible to overcome 

                                                                     is that not doubt

Author's Note

"But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt,
because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea,
blown and tossed by the wind." James 1:6

Reviews

[Victorious]

Dear joshua deathdealer,

I like the first two lines because they are dramatic and like a paradox as they run parallel to one another. I wonder why it went downhill. How come you ended it in such frailty? It went from power to powerless, hope to doubt. Interesting, maybe you meant is that way. I read over and I ponder if the author has shaped the poem in the lines of his mind and the scripture, "being like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind." I wonder if the position of the stanza symbolize the sway.

However, this line, I do not understand, "and take a hold of the reins that guide all these untouchable things." These two I don't understand either, "using my gifts within to shape a new day/am I able to rebuild or is it just a waste." Or you know what maybe it's like a contemplation of wills. I don't know. That's my view.

Thanks for sharing!

Sincerely Livana Lowell (LL)

God bless

[joshua deathdealer]

This poem is the questioning of something that I already know is possible. Therefor the sway in the writing. In the end it is the scripture that reminds me that this is doubt. Thank you for your thought provoking reviews.

[Enigma]

This is brilliant. We are all, devoid of the certainties that we want. And most of our actions/decisions becomes leaps of faith. Your poem stretches the limits of doubt to as far as "beyond the stars" and as close as the "gifts within". Loved this!

[TL Boehm]

I struggle with doubt myself. I believe we all do.

[Ees]

I love this poem. I can see nothing wrong with it. It is beautiful and understandable.
Great job!
I wouldn't mind just one question mark at the end, but that is just for you to think about.
Fantastic job,
have fun,
Erin

[shunik]

I think everybody can feel your poem and somehow relate to it coz it it's true to all
=]

[C.]

This was really enjoyable (: I liked the format of the poem, it made it a lot more visually interesting. A lot of poets don't understand the importance of the visual look of their poetry.

[Draven]

I love the power in the first two lines. They lept off the page at me.

[Ruth]

Doubt is a potent word isn't it? You conveyed the relation of wondering what is possible with doubt perfectly here :)
Guess we have to salute the darkness at times to find that shimmer of light with a message that shall guide us :)
xoxo

[Kenneth The Poet]

Excellent work.

[Pax]

i just love the format, it give the sense of intersection just like the title.
:strain of a mediocre life: a sad and beautiful line..
great job..

[...]

Stunning!