Empty Plate

My sweet Lola Mary went up on my last visit with her last weekend

I witnessed her barely breathing

i saw the oxygen pumping

I saw the machines working as best as the can

I could see her body transform in to a tomb

I told her I was there

I dont know if it was any good

Her eyes were closed

She wasnt as present as before

But I tried to hold on to this now gentle rose

While I went to Nevada I was planning my time of fun

Go to the grand canyon, go to the Hello Kitty Cafe

While realizing the angels were prepping to take her away

On Tuesday morning she went up

6:45 is the time

we cried

we prayed

we stayed

till the coroner took her to her final place

I watched closely while they wrapped her in the sheet

making sure they treated her as sweet as she deserves

the purse of hurt is always full

so when I came home he came to me and hugged me with a pull to his body

kissing me on my forehead

leading me to the bed

he stripped down naked

I couldnt see

it was also my time to bleed

the cramps were killing me

my body was so hungry

for love

for life

so he came inside

he gave it all to me

it had to be him

he is my sweetest sin

life is a mystery

but when death comes with in

it changes my mood

we need to do what we need to do to feel good

its not matrimonial bliss

but its a love unlike anything before

a love i hold close and can still feel myself miss

nothing makes sense

i dont wish to pretend

i also cant make the vow and commit

i dont give myself though to break

life complicates

all i can do is hold on to him and let all the sadness fade

we dont have forever

it feels the sweetest when we are together

all we can do is hold on to the precious moments

even when stolen

life gives and we must take

when all we feel like is an empty plate.