little room

on depression and being alone and the mess in ones room that can accumulate in these states these poems do not necessarily always represent me but at one point maybe all my poems do

the little room 

was round

and sometimes felt square

or was it exact opposite there?

it grew in size

depending on her brain

function on any particular day

sometimes tiny sometimes huge

her moods would change this room

this room was hers

her room to change the colours

the specks the spicks the spocks

her room to do as she please

her bedroom

her sanctuary

messy as it was

lonely as it was

it was hers

and no one could enter

only her dog

this room was hers

her tiny room

in her own mind

cluttered with things of the past 

old albums

faded memories of her past life

old wine bottles

some unopened some empty

old books unread

some half mused over and

flicked pages with food stains

her cd and record collections

tattered covers and mismatched 

hard plastics

old coffee cups with dregs of dirt

tea bags decaying 

from a bright mornings slurp

her cupboard

a mess

who cares no one comes here

I know where my clothes are

they are safe in there 

or on a mound in a basket

she needs to sort  through

her room

her sanctuary

today it felt small

she felt secure in there

the sun hit her head

as she lay on her bed

her room

her tiny room

it enveloped her so

the sun hit her

head her hair her shoulders

burning warm so neatly so

she looked around 

the mess had to go

it had swallowed her so

tomorrow the spring clean

maiden would come out in her 

she surely hopes so

Reviews

[Avia]

Line 13: Her room to do as she pleased
Line 28: some unopened, some empty
In the Opening of the second stanza, you went from a third person narration to first person, so maybe you can insert "..." where the narration changes.
But this is very well detailed and brings to light the way depression and loneliness can affect a person's will to do things. Good work.

[Ariya]

Could relate with it. The trauma and suffering of depression can change the whole person.
Very nicely written.

[An owl on the moon]

A beautifully woven, darkly moving scene of a life seemingly bound to a room that suffocates and stirs her soul. Made me ponder my own habits, once trapped in depression, everything out of control, so now I made sure everything is in order. Perhaps it gives me the sense that I have at least a little control of something in this world.

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Thanks for your honest review yes my rooms a bit of a muddle now maybe need to clean my act up
read moreThanks for your honest review yes my rooms a bit of a muddle now maybe need to clean my act up
lol it takes energy

[An owl on the moon]

Put on some music, maybe light an autumn candle, and then let the cleaning become more like dancing.

[An owl on the moon]

Ah, perhaps a spring candle for you there. :)

[...]

I like this narrative describe language. Make feel I am inside that room. And some part of my room became my soul.

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Thanks so much
For taking time here to read review

[jacob erin-cilberto]

sometimes the clutter just feels safer...reminds us of how our minds are full of baggage and we may in errant state, think is it what we want...like our own fortress...
j.

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Thanks Jacob
For your kind honest review

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

on depression and being alone
we have all felt like this sometimes I would say
safe in her little room