I Lie To Rise No More

Forgotten and Alone,
In Despair and in Pain;
Pain Unbearable, exploding like works of fire,
I listen to my soul,
I hear it's quaky voice...
Low, Slow and Unstable, 
It Cries in submission;
Submission to the never ending turmoils of fate,
A cry of Surrender. . . .
A battle Forfeited. . . .

It is Over,
Vanquished Forever
I lie to Rise no more. . . . 

Reviews

[Richard🖌]

A very sad, forlorn poem, my friend … one that touches deep, tugs at the heartstrings, and calls out to stand and fight for life, to never give-in or give-up, for life is too precious a gift to let go of so easily.
An interesting title to draw the reader in, and wording that strikes the mind with power and intent.
I think you might revisit the phrase "quacky voice" with a better choice that more elegantly matches the rest of your composition … just my thought shared.

Thank you for the privilege of reading and reviewing for you … much enjoyed! ⁓ Richard

[kanyinsola okafor]

Thanks for taking time to review this poem. I indeed appreciate your shared thoughts.

[Richard🖌]

Much better!

[Not here]

great poem :) i enjoyed reading it

[kanyinsola okafor]

thanks for the review, much appreciated