my sorrow

this is the first ever sonnet i wrote. it was for an english class but this got me started on writing even more sonnets. it is a bit sad but then, as they say, it is easier to write depressing poems than happy ones. the sad poems hold more emotion and tru

Behold my heart that I am holding wide open.
It is broken, bleeding, hurt, taken for granted.
Come and read my eyes to see why tears fall often--
They're windows where one can see all I've ever wanted.
I have dreamed, loved, and tried but I keep on failing.
I have never once succeeded in any effort.
But I still keep on dreaming, loving and trying,
Though I know that I would still fail, get broken, and hurt.
My sorrow, my sadness, my pain, and depression
Is losing the man I love and not win him back.
I tried, I gave, I pleaded, but for some reason,
He wouldn't take me back for something he said I lacked.
I found out soon enough what it was and I know,
I did not lack in love, I just failed to show.

Author's Note

abab cdcd efef gg pattern of the rhyme scheme for the sonnet. thanks!

Reviews

[*~Imperfectly Me~*]

You have a good start here... my only suggestion is to make it flow better... It seems to be forced, I understand cause most poems i have done for classes have always been forced. You have a good start with some great images in it... Good Job!