My Night

6/30 paranoia

Some nights are scary,
Others are daring.

In the dark some are staring
But even out, they are glaring
That is all worth sharing,
Since I don't expect one to be caring.

In the dark I am tense,
For there are strong feelings to fence

There's reminders of sleep,
When it wasn't to keep.
Those dead feelings that reek,
They really give me a shriek.

But I wish to seek
The memories at peak

So at night when I wake,
I wonder my sake

Dead feelings then shake,
Soon I see myself quake,
Blood more than a lake,
My own life at stake

Those feelings I've raked
Come right back to wake.

These dead feelings that quake,
Are all at my sake.

I question it all,
Feeling ready to fall

On the floor I will crawl,
Feeling so small

After breaking my skin,
It feels like a win.

The death of my sin,

Leaves me to grin;
Knowing I'd win

Laying in my blood;
Feeling like a broken bud.

I can only smile,
And lay in it for a while.
Soon to clean the red tile,
To then pretend I didn't spiral.

Author's Note

It's haunting