Ashes

From the ashes

My soul shall rise

Splintered among millions

Of burnt specks of dust

Left to ascend

Wherever the ash may fall

And wander the places

Wind may glide them through

Until the fragments of my soul

Are linked together once more

Author's Note

Decided to try a new form of writing. Be harsh with your reviews please; I could seriously use the constructive criticism.

Reviews

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Indicates the way you percieve yourself in the vast paramtars of the planet, concise with a meta-conscious, and astonishingly mature approach, given that you are at an adolecent phase in life. A complimentary rather than a patronising last comment I hope.

[demureminds]

I like how this has a haunting effect yet it is also very serene. Imagery was spectacular as well as the flow.

[Aehr]

nice imagery, very well executed.. i enjoyed this!

[Legolas]

Very good poem. I love the clever idea of this! One change I might make is to change the word 'places'. To me it just doesnt really fit. I wont give you suggestions because it should come from you. Great poem though!

[deepblue04]

This is powerful and raw, although I do have to admit, this seems more like a phoenix being reborn more so than ashes

[Owlgirl]

Powerful, short, yet it holds everything it needs to within itself adn the great vocabulary used. Amazing!

[♪The Girl Next Do..]

Very good. I find this form of writing usually works best when describing either a scene or a memory, but that's just in my experience.

[xxxrawr_friendxxx]

I really like it! :3 Kind of reminds me of how Voldemort dies with his body being turned to ashes... it's probably just me XD But I can't really think of anything to criticize. Keep writing and DFTBA :D

[Jon]

This is beautiful! The symbolism is smooth; the wording is a beautiful tapestry of abstract thought. The only revision I would suggest would be to change "Wind may glide them through" to "where the wind may glide them".

Love it! Love it!