'My Beautiful Balloon'

progress? - what progress?

 

Did you believe in progress
our journey to the stars
Did you hope that one day
we'd get to live on Mars

 

Living on a diet of pills
consumed to cure all ills ...

 

Did you believe the adverts
the glossy space-man suits
in flying cars and rocket ships

 

and

all that hot-air talk ...
of peace and good will?

 

 

(Please note this is listed under `Genre`- `Experimental`)

Author's Note

this piece is a bit of a jibe at all the post-war false hopes from the sixties on and uses
Fifth Dimension's "Up, Up and Away (In My Beautiful Balloon)" (perhaps unkindly!) as a setting for the theme as I remember hearing this many times on the radio as a kid - it kind of stuck I suppose - (of course I was most likely hearing the Johnny Mann Singers' cover version here in the UK!)
is it not all one long question? that's the intention - does it work?
the stark lonely `and` represents a fall back to earth - a jolt - sudden reality and how the balloon so quickly deflates? ha ha
- a guy was going to attempt a record breaking balloon jump yesterday - but it took off without him ... see where I'm coming from?
... and of course the idea that we `progress` ..?
I think I'm trying to create a pause with the ellipses ..?

Reviews

[Solst Rapture]

What do I think? I feel as if English is my 128th language.

I am fearful of my indifference. Not to your poem, but to my opinions. Surely that is a very bad thing? Anyway, it is what it is and we are powerless to agree that the title is the best bit. My beautiful balloon stays in my world. Yours and I think this will please you, seems deflated and ironic. Do I know what I'm talking about? Not for a moment. Will I ever learn? I fear not.

I may have to turn away and dilute my mind with tedium. Any advice on that one? What is poetry? What is this writing game? I'm in it for the wrong reasons and I cannot understand how one might ever succeed. It would be easier writing a story on each verse of the Bible. Do you know, I have hardly ever read the bible. How mad is that? I can't bloody understand it. I'm left feeling like I should castrate myself for being inferior, immoral. Why? Because I LOVE wine.

Still, I think I might have to read the whole thing, to get it our of my system. That might explain things to me. You see, I am only interested in writing this one thing; everything about being human from my perspective, but I am not even capable of knowing it, so writing it is simply out of the question. It's sometimes far more fun just saying exactly what comes to mind because, lets face it, it's full of mistakes.

Why are you not published? I read another chapter of your book. It needs to be on paper. Not these stupid LCD screens that burn your eyes out.

[Celtic Cat]

You bring up a good point in your Author's Note. Why aren't these categories VISIBLE???? Why bother having them if we can't see them!!! I've been told my "story" is a monologue....yes...it is, but they have monologue under a genre instead of a type, and we can't view genre's!!!
As for all the rest of the comments in the note.....interesting details to fill us in. However, I didn't feel like I needed 'em. I liked the idea of just flowing with the piece and drawing my own conclusions. Of course, to write is to be understood....so of course I also appreciate them as much as I thought the piece could stand w/out them.
So...onto review!!
Nope. I don't think we've progressed at all. I think we're more barbaric now than when we lived in caves, only now....we're more savage and creative and secretive about it.
Gah...now I must contradict myself....because your details about the hot air balloon taking off w/out the guy is very informative and hysterical!!! (Forgive me...it's not easy being a Libra, I can see every side of every subject.grr.) Anyway....I was engulfed in this piece and love the way it floated down the page....with me nodding along all the way. Good job!!!
It also reminds me how in "the west" they meditate trying to reach the most inner dimensions...while in "the east" we concentrate on reaching the outer most dimensions. Of course I've put east and west in quotations cuz it's not really acurate geographically....but I do think it gets my point across. : )

[emmajoy]

Could be... it's an interesting experiment and, do you think it ends with Q.E.D?

I truly like the form it takes, plus, it's thirsty for thought.

Think maybe I need to read it again, to walk the era, understand the real nuances.

Thanks for sharing.

[Thomas James Martin]

"Progress is a comfortable disease. . ." (ee Cummings). You hit on some themes dear to my heart. Enjoyed this poem in its impertinence and use of language.

Thanks,
Tom