A Concert Of Humans

living

is taking 

a world full of things
and making more of yourself 
in concert with others

existing
is being

in a world full of others
as if they were things
in concert with no one 

toxic is wishing
failure on others
so you may look better
without trying harder

atoxic is wishing
to be more than just something
so every thing is improved
despite all the agony

in a world full of humans

you cannot just feel
you also must think

to become more than you are

you cannot just hope

to become truly better 

you also must grow

in concert 

with purpose

to become more than just this

what you are. . . as you are

you cannot just be

you also must try

as hard as you ever could

to become more than you are

in concert

growth must always be hard

to ever have the chance

to truly make a place better

we must all coexist

we all must try together

in concert

to make beautiful music

in the face of all doubt,

guilt, shame,

jealousy and adversity 

we must all rise together

or none of this matters

like some s****y one hit wonder

 forgotten, eventually 

nothing

Author's Note

Reviews

[DIVYA]

I like your words here David. They speak the ideal thing. Humans though are complex, asynchronous, discordant notes in the universe. Clashes, disharmony, discord come more naturally to them while peace, consensus, harmony have to be learnt or acquired. This is because we’re full of s**t, envy, jealousy and hatred for one another and intolerant to differences. This then is our natural state. These are just my views. Thank you for such a thought provoking read, my friend.

[Davidgeo]

i agree with that. this was more an idealized statement of competitive cooperation, in small groups this makes more sense than across broader reality. Some people hope for others to fail as a way to succeed, but I find that counter productive at the end of the day. Some people focus on self refinement with a relentless pursuit of perfection as a way to find success regardless, and I find that to be one of the best qualities a person could have. Most of us fall somewhere in between that. But way back when many tens of thousands of years ago I think that essence is what capitulated humans to the top of the food chain despite lacking the physical tools most alpha predators have. Have you ever heard of the 'pareto principle'? It basically states that 80-90% of progress comes from 10-20% of the population. This applies to almost everything measurable en masse... sports, industry, art, etc.. It's very hard to be part of what truly makes something successful, and it has to be that way or everything and everyone would just end up mediocre. The gradient between the worst and the best is necessary but only healthy and sustainable when reached without malice or jealously, etc.. It's a very difficult thought to articulate and I'm sure I cannot do it perfectly.

[Davidgeo]

(I meant "catapulted" not "capitulated" … stupid auto correct makes my s****y spelling into non sense)

[Davidgeo]

The link I'm sharing below is of a video that is mistitled for 'click bait' reasons but very informative none the less and well worth the time. I really hate how youtubers title videos sometimes...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4K-8mBJPQo

[Lady Tyke]

I love this idea of humanity being a concert, complex, detailed, thinking, feeling, yet together, working into something wonderful (well to me anyway).

[Papaya]

I think that if you ever decided to write a Christmas poem this is what it would sound like.
It would not be tinsel and bells and kisses under the mistletoe. It would be about hope.

[Davidgeo]

Thanks doll face. Merry Christmas to you.

[Davidgeo]

(that poem kinda sucked though. i'm on a cold streak lately)

[Papaya]

Merry Christmas. :)

[Chris Shaw]

Living in harmony takes a great deal of effort and a great deal of give and take. Sadly harmony seems to be in short supply at the moment. I like the idea behind these lines though, and we can all live in hope.

Chris

[Davidgeo]

There is an essence of unity that I think most good people unconsciously share regardless of belief or personal impulse. It's why government usually works, why there is always a baseline of index crimes and civil liberties (for example the ten commandments, the magna carta or America's bill of rights; and in a more abstract way, why humans in general have come this far despite being at an extreme physical disadvantage to most top of the food chain type animals (teamwork with a degree of selflessness). But that success has made manifest some modern neurotic and selfish counterproductive behaviors. I'm a narcissistic person who doesn't really care for people that aren't useful to me... but I'm also a rational person that knows how counter productive and poisonous that disposition can be... and what comes out is poetry like this sometimes which I think is a perfect example of overall group progress. Anyway, I'd have spent more time making it more clever and aesthetically pleasing to read but it's kind of depressing to think about given my psychological makeup (and only a narcissist would say that). This review response might be longer than the poem plus your review... (another thing a narcissist would do)