love goes on

love is pure love is bright me and

you underneath the light

love goes on and on it  give you the kreeps

cause when you see people they do it differently

i wish i knew what it meant cause i am living without it

it burns through my soul but you know

who keeps me going  the lord of lords

the king of kings without

him i am nothing

Reviews

[Nathan Durham]

I liked it. It had very powerful feelings. I think the flow was a bit uneven, I agree that you should start a new line every sentence. I really enjoyed it though. Keep up the good work...

[Laura E. Aranda]

I really really like the happy ending to this poem. Again, just go back and let every new line of your poem start a new sentence instead of letting the sentences wrap from line to line....
Example:
love is pure love is bright me and

you underneath the light


That is the way you wrote it. I would write it like this:
Love is pure
Love is bright
Me and you under the light

See what I mean? Also, another hint
When you start a new line....you always capitalize the first letter of that first word regardless! Always!...Okay? Good luck!

Cheers!