Thoughts that bleed..

Don't try and get inside my mind, for I've been trying to escape since the day I was conceived.. Unfortunately even before I could see, I tasted the pain that awaited me, so I severed the cord of life.. All I ask for is a proper burial for a soul who just wanted to be touched by love, but instead drown within my own lifeline.. So please write down a kind thought about me; then spit upon its words, because hate is what kills us all..

Reviews

[Ana D S M]

I very interesting piece that leaves me with so many thoughts and questions.
I enjoyed it. (Spit)

[Chris D.]

Hahaha!! Aka, thanks for the laugh and taking the time..:)

[Tinotenda Nyevedzanai]

"Don't try and get inside my mind, for I've been trying to escape since the day I was conceived.." - I love this opening sentence it's witty and captivating straight from the start, I'd reconsider your use of commas throughout the piece to let the flow roll freely so to speak.

The message itself, this hate and cause for self destruction and thus the creation of which it draws from and consumes us is beautiful. A great piece thanks for sharing - ATC

[Chris D.]

Thanks so much Ally your advice is very wise and has got my mind turning in the right direction.. You've kick started my day with much appreciated thoughts..:)

[Ana D S M]

You're welcome. lilith.

[Ana D S M]

Ha, this was supposed to go above. Nice to meet you ATC.

[Tinotenda Nyevedzanai]

Ha hello :) and you're welcome Chris.

[Sophy Freebirds]

Ahhhh!! You are so right here.I am a cynic too. And reading your words i wanted to gulp down the wine of distrust which would never warm the hope in me.Kudos indeed to you.I really liked this .You surely took a deep dive into head and brought out the pieces which were buried.I like your style.Psycho-analytical in nature its brain-churning.. *keep writing*

~Sophy

[Chris D.]

Wow, you've touched my day and can't thank you enough for taking the time.. I was going for a physical today but your words have me feeling great so I think I'll just skip it and write instead..;) Stay strong and reach out if you need a shoulder..!!