NEW BREED OF ROBOTS

A poem about power.

Look at us people,

Standing in our places,

No thoughts on our minds

Or emotions on our faces.

We are the puppets

On the strings of greater powers,

We have no sense of right

Or sense of what is ours.

Reviews

[Guavaguy]

I'm not sure how I feel about this one. For one thing, its interesting how you found rhymes...definitely a plus. I still feel like the theme is cliche though, which I do not like. But its simple in transmitting an important message and I like that, it doesn't drag on and on, finally, its not a teenage angst poem!

Base: 7
Good Rhyming Pattern +1
Simplicity in Transmission +1
Not a Teenage Angst Poem +.5
Cliche theme -1
Missing something... -.5

[Miguel]

Thanks for the review. :) I wasn't completely sure where I was trying to go with this one, to be perfectly honest. It started out as lyrics for a (metal) song, but I never finished. But thank you very much for the feedback!