(EARTH) WE CANNOT ESCAPE

What has the world come to?

Ashes fall like raindrops,

Silhouetted in the skies.

People watch in terror,

You can see it in their eyes.

They're in a burning world,

Filled with boys and girls.

They can't escape from the flames

Of our planet Earth.

Poverty and suffering,

Homelessness, people begging.

People pleading with their eyes,

Ears are ringing with their cries.

They're in a hopeless world,

Filled with boys and girls.

They can't escape from the pain

Of our planet Earth.

Murdering and maiming,

Ending lives and shaming.

Destroyers of the human race,

Thinking bombs will take our place.

They're in a dying world,

Filled with boys and girls.

They can't escape from the ways

Of our planet Earth.

Reviews

[Fae]

The repetition is an extremely effective tool you have used very well in this poem. The last for lines of each stanza are definitely emphasized, and it's awesome how you have changed the adjective each time to tell a story so to speak.

However, I think that the first 4 lines of each stanza don't need to stick to a specific rhyming pattern since the lines after them are so strong.

Really great poem. I love the subject matter, and you have wrote it in such a way that it feels like one is among the suffering you are portraying.

[Miguel]

Hi, Fae :) Thank you for reviewing. Really helpful review!
I'm glad you think the ends of the stanzas work well and that you liked the topic.

I'm working on revamping this poem as a song; I will definitely keep your suggestions in mind!

~Miguel :)