media and your brain

Empty dry sunken eyes

Chapped pale lips

She stared blankly at her reflection 

Her skin papery and rough

Hyperpigmentation deemed her ugly

And she was ugly

She was selfish, took others for granted and didn't work hard.

She didn't take care of herself and felt bitter at the beauty of others.

She was ugly because she was unhealthy and she didn't attempt to change that.

When she opened her eyes

She'd glance at her phone-

And that was all it took.

She stared at pictures and pictures of the most picturesque models,

Becoming more miserable.

And others began to notice too,

How she reeked of self-loathing.

Or is it really her fault?

Is her addiction her fault?

She felt worthless, pathetic

As she took photos and photos of herself in filters 

To convince herself,

That she was beautiful, she was so desperate

Too desperate

That she cut everyone and everything off,

She isolated herself

Cos she was embarrassed and didn't want anyone to see

the misery she made herself to be.

Dehydrated, chronic tiredness, malnutritioned and possibly anemic,

Her condition was serious.

For a few days, as she stared at picturesque models,

she drew her last breath and collapsed on to the paper face 

of an actress.

Who had felt herself wasting away her life,

Had starved herself 

As she desired to look like the actresses 

And models she'd seen

In so many magazines

She always felt herself repeating the same cycle,

becoming lazy and taking things for granted.

She felt sorry for herself

and played the victim.

She sought for help.

Little by little, 

she started to take care of herself

She slept at night and ate at the right times

As this became a habit, she introduced more, 

She changed the media she consumed

And her life started to feel more than just a pretty face 

Her determination truly made her beautiful

she was no longer a hater and  an egotistical person who sympathized with herself

she was beautiful  inside 

and that's what made her become the very thing 

shed once idolized

She made friends and felt something other than emptiness 

And her determination 

changed her from being a terrible, selfish, greedy, jealous person

to a grateful, giving, kind and honest one.

Us humans are capable of good and evil

Be careful, for the media you consume can rewire your brain, can turn 

you into a ghost of who you could be- try be the good version, try be Jekyll

not Hyde.