Circular Logic

My eyes see a tarnished world
A world with stain
Stain my soul
Soul

 

My soul feels an angry world
A world with hurt
Hurt my mind
Mind

 

My mind needs a better world
A world with delight
Delight my heart
Heart

 

My heart is a willing world
A world with trust
Trust my eyes
Eyes

Reviews

[alternative_be]

I like the form of this poem and the flow it creates.
I even like the shape!
The message is unfortunately very realistic and coming through loud and clear!
Making each stanza begin with the same word the previous stanza ended, makes the message even more catchy, but the way the stanzas emerge into a circular logic at the end gives us hope of a better world.
This will be put between my favorites!

[J.Black]

Wow this is awesome, you are so creative! Wow, let me catch my breath, I am just blown away right now at the form of this. Ha! The message was very clear and strong, I must say I am going to place this into my favorites! :)

[radian7]

Interesting and novel approach. May play around with the form myself. Fran Marie made an intersting observation of the full circle of the poem. Enjoyed it very much.

[DRIVEN]

I enjoyed this and the message in it....circular...coming back to your heart is open to more than your eyes have seen

[Fran Marie]

My eyes see a tarnished world
A world with stain


Trust my eyes
Eyes


You come full circle in this piece~starting with eyes and ending so~ and what's in between

does not disppoint the reader~ wonderfully Crafted and well expressed~

THanks for sharing

Fran Marie

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

I like the repetition in this work. As well as the sentiment expressed - hopeful and uplifting. Thank you for sharing.
Light,
Siddartha

[Who among Fire]

I love the form and also the title. Good work & enjoyable to read.