Who Are You

Letting someone go...

Your thoughts cutting,
slowly mutilating your mind;
distorting your world,
hurting you,
blinding you.
Tormented thoughts
eating through your heart;
destroys everything
you ever held dear.
Pitiful and feeble,
sanity has left your body.
A tortured shadow
that thirsts and craves
and burns along the way.
Who are you
from whom light refrains
and fire pales away in distress.
Who are you?
A vague reflection,
a distortion
of one I used to know.

Mai L. Nissen, 2011

Author's Note

Art by Ditte Løfgren
ditteloefgren.com

Criticism and suggestions are well received

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I love your work Mai. Take reader to dark places and honest endings.
"Who are you?
A vague reflection,
a distortion
of one I used to know."
Sometime we lost what we are and can't be found again. Hard thoughts led to sad ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you, Coyote. I appreciate you reading it and sharing your thoughts :)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Beth Joy Syiem]

Great poem. I like the honesty of this poem. It's almost like I can feel what you feel. A piece of advice would be to maybe limit the use of cliches.

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment! Your advice is appreciated and something that I have thought about myself... It is just difficult for me to go back, when it has been a while and redo certain bits, and remain honest... But I will get it a try :)

[Shivalik Kalsotra]

wonderful writing a piece of diamond of wisdom cutting the mirror with image of illusion...your writing convey you are an awaken soul...I loved it

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment! I am glad you liked it :)

[Jamestown]

Wow! I think this is my new favorite from you, I could feel old feelings resurfacing from
my marriage. The who are you, this is not the woman I married feelings. The
last stanza really says it all for me. Thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for stopping by and for sharing your thoughts, Jamestown. It is scary and surreal when you realize that a person has changed so dramatically.
I am glad you liked it :)