Her

A Story by mangesh

That was the last I saw her

‘Tis so good that my mother has allowed me to take bicycle to school. Going to school in van sucked honestly, not too much, but yes it did. Now, I can be a cool guy on my “Hero Robin Mountain Bike” which makes my whole uniform dirty during the rains because of its thick tires and thin mudguard.

I crashed at the school gates, just in time and ran towards the assembly as it was just going to start. Took over my position as the drum commandant on the side stage. I realized I was early to the school as students till the 6th grade had only lined up on the ground and 7th std was walking towards the ground in a line. I was wondering about why it was so cold in the midst of November, and all of a sudden I saw a new girl in a pink sweater. It has always been rare to see a newcomer in the middle of year. She was thin, had a pony tail, walked very firmly looking down as it was her first day and she did not know much of her classmates. I kept looking at her till she passed. Her aura was very calm and it attracted all my senses towards her. She was very beautiful. And, I was eager to know her name and try to talk with her.

One of my classmates had become a friend of hers, which was such a good thing for me. After a lot of thinking, I gave my friends a hint that I want to know her name and see if they could somehow help me get into a conversation with her. For them, it was the best time to take a revenge. I was bribed for chocolates for several days and then I got to know her name.

I couldn’t have thought of any different name for that soul, it was just a perfect fit for her. Self aware, self righteous, mature, clear thinker, perfect and hardworking. I did not know her very deeply, but it was just her aura which told me all of those things. For a moment, I realized how immature I am. She seemed friendly for she made 3-4 friends in almost a month. I had told some of my friends that I have started liking her and I wanted to see if she felt the same.

Days passed and I started getting distracted from things because of my madness towards her. My little 1 pound brain did not want to think about anything other than her. The world just felt whimsical for some reason I became happy for no reason most of the time. The little kid had started to groom himself to look better in those days trying to copy styles from the internet. All we had those days in our house were 2 android phone. Both of them from very old brands “Intex” and “Micromax”. The access to Micromax was easier as my mother owned it and I could scroll youtube or pinterest for some time when dad wasn’t around. And eventually tried looking at some videos to style yourself as a school teen by this youtuber called “TeachingMensFashion”. It was very different in West for some reason, I don’t really know if it was different or it was just pictured different. But for me, kids from the West always were a cool Graffiti art.

The cold December winds started flowing throughout the city. Similarly the excitement for our schools annual gathering flew in a similar way in our school. For some reason, I wasn’t interested that year at all. But, as usual I was playing flute for the inauguration song. From the looks of it, I remember multiple moments when she used to stare at me straight during the practice sessions. What more could’ve made me happier ?

24th December, 2019 - was the day when the program was going to happen. I always had the habit of reaching some place before the desired time. And similarly, I was there at the school at 3, whereas I was asked to come by 4. This had become a habit for me. But for a change, it wasn’t just me who seemed to have the same habit. I was waiting in the corridor outside the music room, and I saw her walking towards it. She was acting for a skit in the program. I didn’t notice her when she came, all of a sudden I saw her standing some footsteps away from me with a tiffin bag in her hand probably containing some snacks and a water bottle. I had a residue of nervousness in me. She looked very beautiful that day. A white top, black jeans, a simple silver watch in left hand. For a change, she had left all her hair free that day, which enhanced her over all face and looks. As I said earlier, she was very confident at most times. I lacked confidence and I was mostly introvert towards girls at that time. I had taken a lot of time to become friends with my female classmates as well.

She began coming near to me and said, “You play very nice flute”. I felt a bit fragile as to what do I say. Both, my tongue and mind threw some fumbling words conveying thank you. Later on, her smile created a magical whirlpool which I got caught into. Her smile made me go all easy and made my mind very calm. We exchanged a few more words and then she said she had to go and do some final practice of the skit before the program starts. I did the same and we parted on our own ways. The feeling was very different, probably I might not know what love is, but everything which happened made me smile and feel happy about.

Some more days passed, we kept on exchanging a few words every now and then in lunch break or while going home. I kind of have started feeling at ease around her and I feel like I was in love. I’d return home in a whoopty, and keep thinking about her. I felt like Geography was her, Nelson Mandela wasn’t talking about equal opportunities, he was telling me about her, and even the Robinson Crusoe and Family had invited us over for a tea on the Island. Since my childhood, I was a fast adapter, I’d figured out WhatsApp, SMS’s in JioPhone. Some of my friends made a mutual chat room with her which I had begged for. I took the chance to slide into her DM and talk a bit more. We’d often talk about studies, and sometimes about philosophies in general. Sooner, I could understand that she’s having hints that I like her a lot. And I was able to notice this strongly because of how afraid she was becoming sometimes to talk with me in person or even in chats.

A period of awkwardness and distance came in, and we weren’t talking for a long time now. I thought, I will message her and I did that. It was a random saturday afternoon, if I remember correctly, it was 16th January, 2019. We exchanged a few words which did not make sense for sometime. And straight away, I confessed my feelings very raw to her. I just said “I like you and I love you”. I wasn’t scared, maybe I was just a bit nervous, there was no reply for the next 2 minutes, the status changed from “Online” to “Offline” and after 2 minutes, it was “typing…”, the message which was getting typed was a “Same 2 u :)”. And I shout, “And there ya have it, yeaahh!”. The awkwardness was completely erased, I gave a pat to myself for doing that. The kid in me was completely overjoyed by being able to confess something so serious to a girl. School had become even more exciting and fun by then, not the classes or subjects, but just talking to her and looking at her. I remember we had gone for a family trip and returned at 3 AM in the night. The clock hit 7 AM, and I woke up to go for school while my mother said “Go to bed you can skip the school today”. But, I took bath, got dressed up and went to school without breakfast or a cup of tea.

I remember a funny moment, when I was talking to her in front of her van, and the van in front of us moved all of a sudden and I see my mother waiting to pick me up and staring at me. She did not mention anything about it though. My mother is sharp as a blade, she had noticed everything about me talking to her in chats, going to school without missing a single day and more prominently “the worst marks” I was scoring in exams. Multiple times she warned me to get back on track and many a times she asked me why I talk so much with that girl. For someone sharp like her, it was easy for her to conclude that I like her and there is something going between both of us. Days passed on with the same things happening, things between my mum and me were starting to get bad because of these things. She’d often get angry and not talk with me for days.

One night, a day before my Social Studies exam, I start writing her a love letter saying random things about her and us. And, I gave it to her the next day. She really liked my writing and all the things I had written in it. She wrote one back to me, but a bunch of seniors saw us while she was giving it to me. She often advised me to stay away from some runts in my classroom. I was very ignorant of it and in her letter it was clearly written that I shouldn’t even be showing it to my best friend. But when those seniors saw me take the piece of paper. They started chasing. Me and my friends rode very fast trying to run away, but they somehow caught hold on me and made me read it in front of everyone. Exactly something which she never wanted to happen. I failed in keeping everything a secret, all of this slowly started spreading throughout the school. A few teachers got to know about this too.

Before my last exam, I was trying to study the day, it was afternoon and my mom was taking a nap. I received a phone call from her number, which was so-so unusual, I did not pick it up and messaged asking whats up! No reply for the whole day, no reply in the morning. I went to school for the exam, and she wasn’t there in her class on a exam day. Chills started running down my spine and I started getting worried. I did not give a fiddlers fart about the exams. In a while my exam started and after half hour, principles assistant came asking for me, fetched me and took me on the ground floor to the office. By then, I was sure of what had happened. Everything going on between both of us was out and it was her mother who had been calling the day before. I reached the ground floor with the secretary and I see her sitting outside the couch, with tears in her eyes and scared. I could really see the end of everything in her glistening eyes. My mother was fetched too. Her mother had found my love letters in her bag when her mother was checking the class works. I realized, how much stress and pain I had caused to this little 14 year old girl. She had to go through so much because of a childish act of mine.

That was end of the everything, my mother made me finish the exam my parents decided to not let me study in that school anymore. That was the last day, I left the school as a maple leaf in the late autumn season and never saw her again after that. The last we saw each other face to face was outside the principle office when she was sitting on the couch in tears. That was the last I saw her.