Dear Winifred; Nov. 21

Advice (NOT good!) column

Dear Winifred; Nov. 21

Warning; advice given is NOT politically correct!

     "This is Bernice, Winifred's personal assistant.  Unfortunately, Winifred practically drank herself into a stupor last night, and is currently spraying the carpet as the predictable result, and won't be in today."

 

 

     "What the hell?  this is Winifred; my comment to Bernice is, 'Good luck finding a new job, Bernice, because after your barely-disguised

pathetic power grab, you're going to need it, cause I'll make your life a living hell!'  Winifred."

 

     "Dear Winifred, I'm not making a power grab; the fact of the matter is you're watering the carpet and will be unable to make it in to work."

 

     "Dear Bernice, after I'm through, the only thing you'll be blowing is through a stop sign, in your panic to get away from me; I hold your figurative nuts in my hand, and consider it done, I'll yank those puppies clean off!"

 

     "Dear Winifred, please, don't yank my figurative nuts clean off; When you called in sick and said you'd be unable to make it in today, I had to tell your readers something; I didn't mean to upset you; and I'm definitely not making a power grab; I don't want to replace you, indeed, no one could, as you're one of a kind!"

 

     "Dear Bernice; well, I suppose you can keep your job.  I can't stand the thought of leafing through hundreds of job applications just to find someone who's only half a reject, like you.  Consider yourself lucky, and I'll see you tomorrow."

 

     "Dear Winifred, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

 

     "Dear Bernice, okay, that's enough groveling; don't push it until I change my mind."

 

     "Dear Winifred, Okay, until tomorrow then."

 

     "Dear Me, why me?"

Reviews

[Marie]

Winifred was obviously celebrating my birthday.

[Michael Stevens]

Well, Happy Birthday! I probably shouldn't have posted this; it was just me finding the back and forth humorous, but to anybody else, it makes no sense whatsoever!