Dear Winifred; Dec. 18

Advice (NOT good!) column

Warning; advice given is NOT politically correct!

 

     "Dear Winifred, recently, my boyfriend gave me a powerful lesson that I learned the hard way.  About two months ago, he asked me to stop smoking.  Of course I didn't but told him I had.  I just couldn't.  I figured he believed me, until one night we went to an expensive restaurant for dinner.  The food was tremendous.  After a while, I excused myself to use the ladies room.  While I was gone, he had grabbed my cigarettes out of the purse I had left, ground them up, and sprinkled them over my filet min yon.  Needless to say, when I came back from the restroom and took one look at what he'd done, I quit and haven't picked up a cigarette to this day.  The shock of it set me straight.  Signed Cold Turkey."

 

 

     "Dear Cold Turkey, sacrilege!  Oh, I get depressed reading about the murder of innocent cigarettes at the hands of your dick of a boyfriend, not to mention that poor innocent filet min yon.  I tell you, what kind of a nutless wonder are you?  I sure wouldn't let a few crushed cigarettes ruin my dinner; I'd be hoovering that b***h; you'd be getting both eating pleasure and the pleasure of a nicotine high at the same time.  It's the best of both worlds; you wanted my opinion, so drop Dick Boy, and just enjoy lighting up and porking out without the bullshit guilt; Winifred."     

Reviews

[Vidya Bacchus]

Hhahaa really?Drop dick boy?.She really should have eaten it so she could say she ate and had a cigarette at the same time:)

[Michael Stevens]

Yeah, you're probably right Vidya!

[Marie]

Ilaughed at this one. I'd never date a man who smoked.

WInifrred should be forced to eat her own cigarrettes. (And she'd probably enjoy them).

[Michael Stevens]

Yes, she probably would, and I know what you mean about dating someone who smoked; I'd never date a man who smoked, or a man, period; seriously though, that's a buzz kill for me to date any woman who smokes!