"Spin That Wheel!"

A game show!

     "I'd like to welcome our returning champion, Barb Clouder from Logan City, Arizona, as well as today's challenger, Hank Triton!" said a smiling, mustachioed man with gleaming teeth, and a $1,000 suit.  "Let's see Hank, it says here you are a dry cleaning store owner from Wakuminga, Minnesota."

 

     "Yes, that's right, Mace."

 

     The longtime host of 'Spin That Wheel!' smiled at Hank, and said, "Well, that's fascinating; remind me to ask you more about it during the commercial break, okay?"

 

     "Sure thing Mace!"

 

     Barb Clouder from Logan City had a strained, skeptical look on her face, and looked as if she wanted to say something, but remained silent.

 

     "Okay, the challenger gets to go first, and that's you Hank, so grab that wheel and give her a spin!"

 

     Hank gripped the wheel with both hands and gave it a mighty spin.  Round and round went the wheel, until it eventually came to a stop with the arrow pointing to '$200'; "Okay Mace, is there a Q?"

 

     "Is there a Q!"  The buzzer sounded, indicating there was no Q.  "Sorry, there are no Q's.; okay Barb, it's your turn!"

 

     She grabbed the oversized wheel and pulled.  The wheel started rotating clockwise, coming to a stop on 'lose a turn"

 

     "Oh, tough luck Barb!  Hank will spin again, but before he does, watch this message from one of our sponsors."

 

     "And, we're clear!" came the word from the director.  Unlike most game shows, 'Spin That Wheel!" was live, which was a gimmick to get the viewer to watch. 

  

     "Okay, everybody, take five; we'll be on again in two minutes," announced the announcer, Ken Worthington.

 

     "Okay Mace, you said to remind you to tell you more about my being a dry-cleaning store owner."

 

     "And makes you think I would actually give a steaming pile about that?  Someone get this boring a*****e away from me!" he shouted.

 

     Hank was shocked!  Where did that come from?  He had been so nice up until now.  He gave a glance and a shrug to Barb, who came over and whispered in his ear,

 

     "I didn't quite know how to tell you, but I've seen this stuff before.  Apparently, he acts friendly when we're on the air, and is a rude jerk when we're off.  I learned that the hard way."

 

 

 ******

    The rest of the two minutes passed in silence, except right before the cameras rolled once more, Davidson glared at Hank, and stated to say, "Don't you ever just start talking to me, you inbred son of a---and we're back.  I'd just like to remind our players that nobody's ever a loser on our show.  It's all in the spirit of fun, and that's the important thing!"

 

 

******

     The show had a couple more commercial breaks, which passed in stony, uncomfortable silence, and Hank wished he were somewhere, anywhere, else.  He was actually glad he'd lost, as poor Barb had a haunted look, like,

 

     "You mean I have to come back, again?"

 

******

     Mace Davidson was all smiles on camera, but a scowling grump-a*s off.  And here Hank had been actually looking forward to meeting "America's Uncle", as Davidson was known by everyone.  He had a good reputation among his millions of viewers.  More Like America's Unfunny, Prick Uncle, thought Hank.

 

 

     Mace Davidson had become so burnt out hosting "Spin That Wheel".  Of course, his foul mood just happened to coincide with his recreational huffing of model glue.  He wasn't sure what the cause was, but he was sure if he had to put up with another trailer trash cowboy, many rung down on the smarts ladder, he'd...

 

The End

 

    

 

     

 

    

 

              

 

    

 

    

 

        

Reviews

[A. H. Pinley]

You tell this story well. A little on edge, but that's fine. Good work!

[Michael Stevens]

Thank you A.H!

[Marie]

well, this certainly sounds like a familiar game show. I'd like to hope Pat Sajak isn't that way.

You told this in a very witty and clever manner, but I think you ended it too soon.

[Michael Stevens]

Thank you, and that's the same thing my ex wife used to say!

[Marie]

I didn't understand what you meant and had to read my comment again. Your remark was even funnier than your story.

[Michael Stevens]

Thank you; I KNEW my old sex life wound be good for something!

[Marie]

And that comment made me laugh even more...

[Michael Stevens]

Well, thank you, but you're going to be sadly disappointed with this one; I got nothing!