Riding the D Train to Ralphville!

Memories, BAD memories!

Ah, memories, huh?  Mostly good times, but a few not

 

Like when I was in high school and really thought I knew it all

 

I figured I knew, for example, how much booze I could handle

 

Turns out I was so wrong; like the night I rode the D train

 

To Ralphville; the D stands for dizzy, Ralph for heave

 

Anywho, I really thought I was cool, downing brews with a funnel

 

You look back on your youth wishing some things you hadn't

 

Done, and this was one; three beers in 20 seconds, why?

 

It started off as fun, but by the 2nd funnel-full,  turned to regret

 

When my face turned green and my legs barely worked.

 

As I raced for the bushes; my friends at least had a good laugh

 

About halfway there I turned into a human sprinkler,

 

In a never-ending stream; watering the grass, the shrubbery, and my socks

 

I staggered back to my friends, who tried to hand me the

 

Object and reason I spewed; well, stupidity was the reality!

 

That night, I learned the hard way two things;

 

Drinking beer with a funnel is really, really asinine,

 

And I'd spend the next day clothes shopping!

 

Reviews

[Marie]

I don't understand how could could drnk beer with a funnel. WOuldn't it pour rout the little opening?

[Michael Stevens]

You block the opening with your finger, pour 3 or so beers in, put the end over you mouth, and get ready!