Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy!

It's the truth, at least I've been told it is!

Hunkering down, sheltering in place,

what's this s**t I see with my face?

Every news network, save for one,

if handing me liberal bias, is this a rerun

from yesterday, last week, last year?

They're all telling me I've nothing to fear,

can you believe that s**t? More Lefty lies, with all

the threats in the world? With civilization about to fall?

No sir, Fox tells it like it is, it's the only truth-teller.
They do my thinking for me, even though I'm a smart feller.

Those liberal b******s all got together to pull the wool over my eyes.

I'm telling you, you can't trust them, it's nothing but lies

spewing from the left, and beamed directly to my brain,

what they're saying, Fox says, is completely insane.

You know, I do believe this Kool Aid isn't bad,

it's just about the tastiest s**t I've ever had!