Gone

When they were gone and this was all I had to hold on to.

Last night I fell asleep with
one hand touching her pink and purple
shredded blanket and the other
resting on the telephone.

I would say like being a child again.
Little securities making
the world go soft -
but I was never that child.

Sometimes it is just as simple
as saying: yes, there are times
when I hurt so much -
physically, mentally, both -

that all it takes is the feel
of her blanket to bring back
a slight scent, a slight pressure
(she could be lying against me)

and the feel of the telephone
recalling a kind of connection
to you that almost makes
you there if I shut my eyes.

Sometimes these things
can lull me to sleep.