clarity

a revelation for a girl who didn't realize her role as a jumpoff

But after you f#*k me

You try to duck me

And act like you can't see me

'Cause you're with your wifey...

I see...

Reviews

[d]

Aiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight!!!

[Brjden (Bridge-Den) Cre..]

That's real talk! Is this from real experience? I would love to see a full, lengthy version of this piece.......

[☮]

I think it's tight, haiku or not. It's definitely the sentiment of the "other woman."

I would take out the #* though. Writing has no rules. You can say "f**k" - I doubt any poet would be offended.

You have a wide array of material and I was feeling this. On to the next...

[Tanya]

i really like it. it intesnse and heart felt. you might want to recheck the whole haiku thing, because it's not. overall though good. mind reading some of my work?

[Butterflymom]

I liked the intensity of this! You expressed the sentiment very well. I like your style, but must agree it's not haiku....but good nonetheless!! Keep writing!

[Legion]

Yea that is rough and a good piece to show that, but not a haiku hon. Good write none-the-less.