Twisted Ride

In search of some meaning
Drowning in misunderstanding

My head feels like its spinning
With no chance of winning
This game that my thoughts play
In battle for control

The winner takes all
But will I lose my soul?

I feed the monster until it can't take anymore.

Numbing all with silence
And a refusal to give in
My tired mind wants rest
But my heart wrestles on.

Neither sleep, nor food
Or stories of happiness
Can break through the storm
Raging on within

Until a day of light relieves
The pressure of beliefs unknown
And for one moment I can sigh
With deeper longing for peace even still.

Oh, a day it is, but only one day
Then plunged back into the chaos
Of  a broken dream, and struggling faith

Fighting and gasping and tired and weak
This catch twenty-two goes around again.