I don't know how to act

i'm sad,.

I'm not sure how to act.

if i should me furious that you don't understand me.

should i be sad? no, that's just weak.

my words, in explanation, have no weight
to you, at least.

Hun, I'm really trying.

I'm trying to show you that I don't know how to be happy.

I'm trying to show you that I forgot what it feels like to smile.

I'm realizing that not all frowns are sad

some can be comforting

it's all i know.

and this sweater, this ugly yellow thing--

it's wet with tears and making my hands cold

i don't know how to stop crying

Author's Note

deeply