Shadow dancers for M 'lady Arabella

pem in rhyming quatrains Iambic tetrameter

Shadow Dancers.

The shadow which throughout the day
have hidden quietly away.
In nooks and crannies which they know
Day is their time for lying low.

When darkness falls come out to play.
Although the sunlight rules the day.
The silver moon's in charge by night
and she has granted them the right.

To freely frolic through the night
they do not fear her gentle light.
Though when the sunrise lights the skies.
They hide again if they are wise.

Perhaps the sleep all through the day
I do not know I cannot say.
I only know it's my delight
to see the shadows dance at night.

They can appear and disappear
but they are far too fast I fear.
For human eyes to clearly see
the shadows dancing gracefully.

Our eyes accustomed to the light
don't work efficiently at night.
Though sometimes watching quietly
You see them dancing silently.

17-Jan-09

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Reviews

[Kirby Lund]

I really enjoyed the content of this poem--your personification of shadows is spot-on; however, you've got a few typos, and some of your punctuation seems off or missing. If you'd like, I'll proofread it for you how I would write it--I wouldn't change words or rhymes, because they're all great. I'd just tweak puncuation and fix a couple misspellings. Overall, a very good poem that's needs just a little revision.